Hot Slut Of The Day!
Pocket Rockers!
HitClips, the iPod of the late-90s, got their HSOTD tribute years ago, but I never gave a proper homage to the important cassette pioneer who paved the way! Wikipedia says that Pocket Rockers (which is the perfect name for a little person supergroup made up of Bruno Mars, Thom Yorke and Paul Simon) were made by Fisher-Price who first put them on the shelves sometime in the late-80s. It was a cassette player, that looked like it came directly out of the bowels of the 80s, and it could play miniature 8-track-like tapes. Nobody but Fisher-Price made the tapes, so there weren’t that many of them and they only had two songs on each one. But they offered up songs by Lisa Lisa, Tiffany, T’Pau, Taylor Dane, The Jet and Exposé. So they basically had every song that matters in life.
The Pocket Rockers tapes could also be worn as fashion accessories. Either everyone at my school was too poor to buy Pocket Rockers, or we were all dressed like shit and knew nothing about real fashion, because I never saw anyone working a Pocket Rocker tape. Every kid in this commercial could easily fit in on the runway at a haute couture show in Pair-eee, and it’s all because of their Pocket Rocker tape accessory!
Pocket Rockers were buried in the Fisher-Price graveyard in 1991. I couldn’t find any Pocket Rockers on eBay, and I’m assuming that’s because every Pocket Rocker owner can’t even think of selling theirs even though the likes of Sotheby’s and Christie’s have promised that they’ll get millions for it at auction. They should never sell and should keep their Pocket Rocker safe in a vault with their other precious jewels, because it will always be a priceless bauble of 80s perfection.
Pic: Etsy