Irish vulgarity translator Jamie Dornan went on Conan to sell the thankfully last film in the Fifty Shades of This Isn’t Doing Much For Making Kink Look Fun trilogy. Because you’ve got to have a gimmick, the prettiest serial killer in existence (The Fall made me understand why Ted Bundy had groupies) had a story about taking off co-star Dakota Johnson’s panties. I’m pretty sure this is the same sort of story Clark Gable told about Vivian Leigh’s drawers on Tonight Starring Steve Allen.
Jamie implied that Dakota was unimpressed with how he took off her underwear while they were filming a scene during the first flick. Seeing as these two have the fiery chemistry of house cats and water, he must have just sighed and dutifully yanked down her underwear with all the finesse of your six-year-old rampaging through their wrapped gifts at Christmas. Dakota slowed his roll, according to UsWeekly.
“I think Dakota would be quicker to give me a note than a director,” he told the late-night host. “I guess there’s a sexy way to take off a girl’s underwear.”
Judging from their appearances together, one would think the only note Dakota would be passing Jamie would read “Stay away from me.” But Anastasia WhateverTheFanFic gave it a go.
He then shared the advice: “There’s a more delicate and sensual way to do it, which is thumbs into the side … and then you sort of shimmy it down.”
Watch Jamie giving a visual demonstration for Conan and his audience below. Warning: Watching Conan O’Brien mime taking a woman’s panties down with his face clenched and looking like a witch checking her familiar for ringworm might make you moist.