Open Post: Hosted By Jared Leto Looking Like Jesus If Jesus Was In A Cult Devoted To The Bee Gees

January 29, 2018 / Posted by:

At the 2018 MusiCares Person Of The Year Honoring Fleetwood Mac event on Saturday night, Jared Leto sashayed onto the red carpet in a look that was an homage to different religions and cults. Jared paid homage to Christianity with that Jesus-like mop. He paid homage to Charles Manson with that overgrown pube beard from hell. He paid homage to Scientology with those Tom Cruise-approved Cha Cha heels. And he paid homage to one of my religions, Elvira in Scarface, by wearing a casual pants version of the impeccable white suit she wore.

For a while now, Jared Leto hasn’t been leaving his house without looking like Gucci just blew a fat, sloppy, ugly clown load all over him. But on Saturday night, everyone at Gucci cried while holding each other and wondering what they did wrong, because their #1 bitch cheated on their asses by wearing neck-to-toe Helmut Lang!!! But Gucci shouldn’t be too sad, I’m sure Jared will be back in their grandma wallpaper-covered arms soon. Since Jared was at an event honoring Fleetwood Mac, he probably thought he should do himself up in 70s Mick Fleetwood drag. Although, that white suit is only something Mick Fleetwood would wear if his first husband dumped him for a younger piece and he joined forces with other scorned first wives to open up a crisis center for women in Manhattan.


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