Kevin Spacey To Check Off Next Box On “Celebrity Super-Creeper Rehabilitation” Checklist

November 2, 2017 / Posted by:

Despite conflating homosexuality with pedophilia and fucking over all of the gays who have been battling that evil stereotype since Jesus times, Kevin Spacey does have one positive thing going for him. He can take orders! Variety reports that Kev’s “seeking evaluation and treatment” for his alleged tendency to grab every crotch in his vicinity without consent, as well as allegedly belly flopping on a 14-year-old boy when he was 26. This means that Kevin is probably following the direction of the crisis management team he obviously hired after tweeting his disastrous choosing to live as a gay man but not a pedophile veritable mash note to homophobes. (Choose?!?)

In a statement, his rep gave us the usual.

“Kevin Spacey is taking the time necessary to seek evaluation and treatment. No other information is available at this time.”

As has been happening with all of Hollywood’s hidden grabby fuckers, the floodgates have opened and multiple accusations of sexual assault and harassment are being leveled against Kevin Spacey. Actor Anthony Rapp’s interview with Buzzfeed about Kevin allegedly climbing on top of him when Rapp was 14 and Kevin was 26 have led to other claims from actor Roberto Cavazos and documentary filmmaker Tony Montana. The Independent also spoke with “British barmanDaniel Beal who had a very Spacey story to tell.

A British barman, Daniel Beal, alleged the actor approached him as he took a cigarette break while working at a West Sussex hotel, sitting down beside the then 19-year-old on a bench, flashing his privates and telling him, “It’s big, isn’t it?”, before trying to pull his hand toward him.

Buy a ruler, asshole! Beal claims that Spacey then followed him inside and tried to give him a £5000 Swiss watch to keep quiet.

And, of course, there’s more. The Guardian reports that the famed Old Vic theater in London, where Kevin served as artistic director from 2004 to 2015, is being accused by some employees of ignoring accounts of him sexually harassing multiple men when he worked there. One former employee said that he witnessed Kevin grope many a crotch and staff never said anything. The Old Vic has since set up a confidential tip line for current and former employees to call in with stories about Kevin molesting them.

It sounds like Kevin should have stuck to going for those early morning “dog walks” in London parks back then. Sure, getting “mugged” (*side-eye*) sucks. But if you’re cruising in the bushes and find someone, it’s fair to say it’s probably a consensual situation for once. We’re talking about “dog walking” of course.


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