Scarlett Johansson Showed Up At Colin Jost’s Comedy Show In Boston

October 30, 2017 / Posted by:

Scarlett Johansson was in my city?!?! WHY DID I GO TO P-TOWN FOR THE WEEKEND?!?! I can see drunken bears inappropriately costumed as handmaidens from Gilead any old October! People reports that ScarJo was sighted at boyfriend Colin Jost’s comedy gig in Boston Saturday night.

Does this mean she’s case dismissed the lawyer? Ugh, I should be shunned for that one. Scarlett and Colin have been an item since May, and he recently went all in on his gushy love for her when asked at the Emmys. They were spotted leaving the Wilbur Theater after his show. They were holding hands and everything!

How could I have missed this opportunity to awkwardly stare at her, and nudge my husband, and for him to ask “who?” and for me to hiss “IT’S SCARJO!” and him to go “who’s that?” And then for me to file for divorce. He doesn’t care about celebrity. I don’t get it. That should qualify him for handicapped parking.

“They looked happy together,” an onlooker tells PEOPLE of the couple’s night out.

Colin Jost seems like one of those clean-cut good guys who won’t make her open up a gourmet popcorn shop in Paris. Unless that’s why she was in Boston. Did she catch gourmet popcorn entrepreneur fever despite divorcing that dude and she’s going to open up a gourmet popcorn shop here? Ugh, it’s like when everyone opened up cupcake shops and more than one is probably too many. And popcorn gets caught in my dentures. When the number of cupcake shops starts to lap a=the number of bars in Boston, there’s a problem.


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