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Hug ‘N Talk Napper!

Mattel released the Hug ‘N’ Talk Napper plush dog toy before my mom and dad decided to try for a Band-Aid baby (aka me), but I still knew of its existence, because it made appearances through the 80s. Mattel started selling Napper sometime around 1978. Napper was a stuffed animal dog toy who was always in my dog’s favorite mood, LAZY, because all it did was take naps. Hug ‘N’ Talk Napper was a huggable plush toy who was basically a Boyfriend Pillow for kids, because it cuddled with you during mimi times, and it’d also make dog noises and talk when you pressed its belly. Napper would say shit like, “I’m lonely,” and, “ruff ruff ruff.” Napper truly prepared kids for when they’d grow up and have to deal with a needy piece who always wanted to cuddle and complained about feeling lonely and shit.

I never spent time with Napper, but based on this video of it talking, it shouldn’t be lonely. Because it’s obvious that it’s always got company in the form of an evil demon that has possessed its body.

Hug ‘N’ Talk Napper never became a huge hit and it was eventually canned. But you know, Mattel should bring it back and this time market it as a Fleshlight for Plushies. They’d need a bigger bank account for all the money that would roll in.

Pic: eBay