Open Post: Hosted By The Tsunami Of Dildos That Washed Up On An Italian Beach

September 24, 2017 / Posted by:

Are you currently in Italy, looking for sex toys, and finding yourself a little short on cash this week? Hop on your moped and get yourself to the seaside by the Hermitage of Camaldoli. It’s on Italy’s western coast near Naples. According to The Sun, the probably alternately amused/disgusted lifeguards have had to close the beach due to an influx of dildos that have washed ashore.

The dildo armada was discovered by members of Licola Mare Clean Association, who keep the shoreline clean.

One volunteer, who did not wish to be named, said: “When we saw them we started to laugh because we could not do anything else.”

And I bet at least one of those saucy seascrubbers secreted a sea dildo away in their pocket, figuring that salt water is purifying and that he or she could always boil it at home to be sure.

Umberto Mercurio, the president of the association, explained that lots of trash ends up on that particular beach due the flow of sea currents. They’ve also had influxes of dead animals, and even live rabbits (!!!). (Hopefully floating on driftwood?)

Children have been banned from the beach due to the dildo infestation, and it’s not known when the ban will be lifted. Hey, it could have been worse. It could have been syringes. Or corpses.

Pic: Channel 4

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