Robert Pattinson Refused To Jack A Dog Off For A Movie

August 4, 2017 / Posted by:

The filming for Robert Pattinson’s movie seems a little, well, icky. As Edward Cullen, he wasn’t that into werewolves, and, as an actor, he ain’t that into pup play, either. Page Six reports Robert was on Jimmy Kimmel Live last night promoting his new flick Good Time, and it sounds like he didn’t have that much of one when his director tried to get him to wank off a pooch. I get character acting, but dog diddling has me channeling Phaedra Parks saying, “Something in the buttermilk ain’t clean!” Um, say wha?

Even Twi-hards probably had a hard time hearing what their precious Edward was asked to do:

Robert, rocking his usual finger-in-the-electric-socket hairdo, said, “There’s a drug dealer who busts into the room and I was sleeping with the dog and basically giving the dog a hand job.” You know, if some crack dealer came hunting someone down for unpaid debts, I think if he beat down the door only to see some low-life choking the chicken of a schnauzer, it miiiiiiight have him back up and be like, “K! Paid in full!” Some of the movie production team sounds like a bunch of nasties, because Robbie gave further deets:

“I asked the trainer, ’cause the director was like, ‘Just do it for real, man! Don’t be a p—y!’ And then the dog’s owner was like, ‘Well, he’s a breeder, I mean, you can.’ He’s like, ‘You gotta massage the inside of his thighs.’”

Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should, and apparently Rob thought the same and diddled a fake red rocket instead. Dog wangs of any kind weird me out: the only place a tube of lipstick belongs is on a drag queen (ok, they can go anywhere… just not nethers!), so ick ick ick. PETA must be especially Team Edward today, because they are lauding Rob for shying away from the canine molestation. I’m especially Team Edward today because… ICK!



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