Open Post: Hosted By The New “Futuristic Evil” McDonalds Uniforms

April 22, 2017 / Posted by:

If the Death Star had a food court and that food court had a McDonalds, well – feast your eyes on what the uniforms would have looked like. Grand Moff Tarkin on the fryolator! This is what you see when you order your Chicken McNuggets pre-blowing Alderaan to bits. Paelofuture is showing off the new McDonalds USA uniforms and damn, monochrome space drab.

The new togs are by designers Waraire Boswell and Bindu Rivas, and were supposedly developed based on feedback from employees and customers. Were everyone’s serotonin reuptake inhibitors malfunctioning the time this survey was distributed?

“Our new collections focus on comfort, fit, functionality and contemporary professionalism, delivering a uniform that crew and managers will feel comfortable to work in and proud to wear,” said Jez Langhorn, McDonald’s Senior Director of HR. “Beyond that, it’s another step in the company’s continuous effort to raise the bar by investing in people and improving the restaurant experience with a focus on hospitality.”

Life is morbid and depressing enough. I go to McDonald’s to eat life-shortening food to get through the bad stuff in life. It’s going to be difficult to inhale my two delicious apple pies for a buck, with a reminder that lonely death is the endgame for all of us staring me right in the face.

Pic: McDonalds

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