As Aaron Rodgers’ Family Sings, “Ding Dong The Witch Is GONE…”

April 7, 2017 / Posted by:

If you live near one of Aaron Rodgers’ family members, I’m sure you’ve got a pair of industrial-strength ear plugs shoved into your hearing holes, because you just can’t take the sound of them partying and hollerin’ while celebrating the fact that may never have to see Olivia Munn’s current face live and in person again!

Olivia Munn and Aaron Rodgers got together three years ago, and last year stories came out about how he hasn’t seen his family that much, because they don’t like that he’s gone all celebrity on their asses and they would also rather fuck themselves in the ass with a Japanese potato than hang around her. Aaron’s dad, Ed Rodgers, aired his family’s dirty laundry out in public by talking to The New York Times and telling them that fame can change people. Aaron’s brother Jordan Rodgers, who won The Bachelorette, wah wah wah’d about missing his brother during his hometown date with the chick who picked him.

Aaron kept his lips shut about what his family told the media and he kept on with Olivia. There was a rumor in January that 36-year-old Olivia and 33-year-old Aaron got engaged. But it looks like we won’t ever see grainy iPhone camera footage of Aaron’s family tackling him on the altar right before he marries Olivia, because they’re done. A source spit out this generic break-up statement to People:

“They have amicably ended their relationship of three years,” a source close to the situation confirms to PEOPLE exclusively. The source says the couple “remains close friends and wish nothing but the best for each other moving forward.”

The scent of bullshit is wafting off of that statement, because when a relationship contract ends, you immediately delete the phone numbers of your piece and your piece’s PR team. But I hope that statement is true and that Aaron and Olivia will not only remain close friends, but will become best friends forever. Maybe they’ll even become roommates. I mean, Aaron does need a roommate since his last “roommate” moved out a while ago.

So if Olivia and Aaron really are staying friends, then the neighbors of his family members better keep those ear plugs in. Because Aaron’s family will let out blood-curdling screams when Aaron brings his best friend Olivia Munn to the “Congratulations, You’re Free Of That Evil Bitch!” party they threw for him.

Pic: FameFlynet

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