Hot Slut Of The Day!

Pete Parkkonen, the yodeling sex god of Finland!

I doubt that your loins have fully recovered from quivering themselves raw while watching #SaltBae sensually salt a big piece of meat, and it doesn’t look like they’re going to fully recover anytime soon thanks to today’s crotch seizure-inducing HSOTD. Pete Parkkonen sounds like the Finish version of Peter Parker and well, he will make ALL of your senses tingle with hot day-shift Chippendale’s dancer moves, fuck-me eyes, greasy nipples and luscious Fabio mane.

Pete first started making parts throb in 2009 when he was a contestant on Finland’s Idol where he ended up in third place. Pete went on to make a couple of albums and last month he delivered lubed-up raw sex in the form of his video for Kohta sataa. Reader Emma, who dropped this into my inbox, tells me that translates to It’s About To Rain in English. That’s an understatement, because this video is the El Niño of Finnish music videos and may cause a torrential downpour of crotch pudding in your panties.

Emma also tells me that Pete sings about doing his lady right, but he really doesn’t need that lady. Because judging by this video, Pete’s already got his true love, himself, and nobody does Pete the way Pete does Pete. The video starts off with Pete busting out a golden shower (DonaldTrumpPerksUp.GIF) and then he goes on to make hand love to his entire oily body and ends with busting out a giant load of foamy white stuff. Usually I’m not into masturbation videos, but watching the Finnish Robbie Williams artistically make sweet love to himself in an abandoned warehouse is mesmerizing and has done things to me.

Now imagine what Pete does to himself while watching that video of him doing himself. You know, I just did and my brain jizzed so much that it’s leaking out of my ears.