“And unto Earth there shall be an angel. An angel mostly made of silicone and prescription drugs. This angel shall be raised as the child bride of a loathsome toad wart and together they shall procreate and humanity will come to a close.” I’m sure you all remember that from the Good Book. It speaks of the pregnancy of Courtney Stodden. And now Courtney brings us more, umm, news on her upcoming parenting.
Courtney and her truck stop killer-looking captor, I mean husband, Doug Hutchison announced they were going to have a baby back in May. Courtney claims she is 8 weeks along and she’s keeping that press train going. She spoke to People about her predictions on her child’s sexuality:
If it’s a boy I am going to dress him up in tutus. I know I am going to spoil my baby rotten. I’m going to be a fun mom. I always say I am going to have a girl regardless, and if it’s a boy he’ll be gay!
I’m glad to see that pregnancy hasn’t affected her brain’s main function: getting attention. Yes, Courtney’s possible gayby will have her and Doug as parents, but at least he’ll have his mother’s good taste. We could be talking about the next Bobby Trendy!
And thanks to this People article, we have Michael K’s two favorite things in one place: an elegant rose and the phrase “over-the-moon“! Yes! Congratulations Michael K! Courtney said, “My husband has been my rock. He is over-the-moon excited! And he’s so connected to me that he’s basically having morning sickness.” Well, I too must be connected to Courtney because the thought of Doug procreating makes me throw up constantly.