Jeopardy’s Margaret Miles Is April’s Hot Slut Of The Month!

Pet all the pussies and knit until your fingers fall, because it’s Friday night AND Margaret Miles won April’s Hot Slut of the Month’s battle royale. Margaret was America’s sweetheart for about 2 nights last month when she declared on Jeopardy that she’s a stereotypical librarian whose idea of a hot time is petting her cats and knitting. And now, Margaret is Dlisted’s sweetheart after she killed the competition without messing up her impeccable overgrown Lloyd Christmas haircut.

Margaret got just under 42% of the votes and her closest competition was Planters Cheez Balls with a little over 24%. Diamond and Pearl got about 17% of the votes and the midriff lothario of the NFL, Ezekiel Elliott, came in last place with 16.7%. Margaret will now go on to next year’s Hot Slut of 2016 finals with Ludivine The Dog, Flossie Dickey and Birdie Sanders.

And let’s relive the moment when Margaret Miles became everyone’s party time hero:

Thanks to everyone who voted!

Pic: ABC