E! Better Make It Rain On Blac Chyna’s Ass If They Want Her On KUWTK

March 28, 2016 / Posted by:

Rob Kartrashian, the shame stain on the Kartrashians’ pristine reputation, hasn’t been on the family’s whore show Krapping Up The Kartrashians for a while, because he apparently hates them more than he hates vegetables not covered with nacho cheese and they don’t want the entire world to know that they’re related to a fat fat fatty. But because KUWTK’s season 11 ratings were reportedly lower than Pimp Mama Kris’ sense of morals, producers may be looking to boost that shit by showing Rob’s totally real and 100% authentic relationship with Blac Chyna. Um, the producers should know that if they really want the ratings to shoot into the universe and beyond, they should do a very special episode where they drop the Kartrashians and their wart hog asses into a pit full of starving tigers.

A source tells TMZ that Blac Paper Plates wants to meet with the showrunners of KUWTK to talk about her “guest starring” on the Ninth Circle’s highest-rated show. Blac Chyna apparently thinks that footage of her talking with Rob’s sisters is worth a lot, so she wants at least $1 million. She’s also not willing to sign an exclusive contract, because she’s hoping that she and Rob will get their own reality show. Since Blac Chyna seems to be reaching far into the universe of delusion, she should also ask for a real-life unicorn, a jar full of rainbows and her own on-set plastic surgeon who will immediately replace her OGO ball ass cheeks when they start to deflate a little on camera.

I don’t know what’s a funnier Kardashian-related story: Blac Chyna thinking E! will give her $1 million or the media presenting the fame whore tale of PMK leaking Kim Kartrashian’s sex tape on purpose as new news? But really, Blac Chyna was practically cut from the same spotlight-humping cloth as the Kartrashians, so methinks she’d do the show for a lot less than $1 million. She’d probably do it for the attention alone. I, for one, hope she does do it and I, for one, hope she makes the most of it by announcing that she and Rob eloped because she’s knocked up with his twin spawns. That’ll make PMK’s demon head spin until it fell off. It’d be the perfect episode. That episode would almost be better than the pit full of tigers episode.

And here’s PMK, her leased piece Corey SomethingOrAnother, Khlozilla, Lamar Odom, Kendull Jenner and the Slow One going to church in outfits that they knew would get them a million “Whores In Church” headlines:

Pics: Instagram, Wenn.com, Splash

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