My nose has never smelled Johnny Depp in person. The closest scent association I have for Johnny Depp was the time I sat behind a person who kept ripping popcorn butter farts during Black Mass. But if I had to guess what he smelled like, based on several years worth of pictures of Johnny Depp looking like something that crawled out of a truck stop shower drain, I’m picturing a blend of cigarettes, bed head, pennies, damp toothbrush, and however you’d describe the contents of a clothing donation bin. Sort of like a mix between 7-day camping trip and porch couch.
However, according to Johnny Depp, I’m way off. Johnny was at the 2nd Annual Beauty Awards (no, not as part of a surprise makeover) on Sunday to present the 2016 Fragrance of the Year award to the Dior perfume he gets paid to wear, and UsWeekly says he educated everyone on what Johnny Depp smells like. As it turns out, Johnny Depp smells the exact opposite of how you think he might smell.
“When I met people they said, ‘You do look like a hobo, but you smell really good.’ And goddamn it, I smell really good!”
Johnny says he owes his not-hobo smell to that Dior perfume and says he really enjoyed helping to create it. I bet the first day in the fragrance lab was really a whole lot of fun for everyone. “Wait, so you’re telling me I could spray this stuff all over my body and no one will be able to tell that I haven’t showered since last Wednesday? Wow, I wonder what will science come up with next.”
Here’s Hollywood’ Sexiest-Smelling Hobo Vampire at the Beauty Awards last night. No word on whether that “smelling really good” situation also applies to his breath, but those crusty teeth of his are telling me that’s probably a hard no.