Open Post: Hosted By Prince’s Pucker-Inducing Passport Portrait

February 17, 2016 / Posted by:

Every airport is going to have to add a fainting settee behind every TSA check-in podium, because any agent who gets Prince’s passport photo is immediately going to get the vapors and fall back. Prince tweeted his brand new passport picture and I had to pull out my own passport while looking at it, because it took me on a spiritual journey to another world and back. And yes the Land of Prince Passport stamp is his glossy lip print.

Where to begin, where to end and where to take a break when his fancy lesbian beauty hits you so hard that you need to rest?

Boy George once “joked” that he got naked with the dandelion Thumbelina, and maybe he was joking about that, but he definitely taught Prince how to tame an eyeliner pencil like a master. Who else could’ve taught him how to perfect a flawless eyeliner situation that makes Adele seethe with jealousy? Jehovah’s Most Heterosexual Witness also doesn’t like it when dudes touch him, but it looks like he got close enough to Blaine Edwards and Antoine Merriweather to learn how to give a pout that makes the angels swoon.

And that’s just the beginning of that picture. I didn’t even fully get into his “church memaw rouge” or his resting Batman logo stache.

Basically, Prince’s passport picture screams: Maybe she’s born with it. Maybe she’s Prince.

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