Being Born Is The Most Influential That Has Ever Happened To Jaden Smith

October 31, 2015 / Posted by:

Yep, you guessed it: even more Deep Thoughts, courtesy of wealthy teenage philosopher Jaden Smith. Will and Jada’s kid was recently named one of TIME magazine’s 30 Most Influential Teens of 2015, a list that also includes Kylie and Kendall Jenner, so…that should tell you everything you need to know about that. TIME also talked to Jaden, because apparently TIME wanted to get the kind of high that comes from a drug called “Jaden Smith opening his mouth and letting thoughts fall out.

Jaden Smith clearly had some nuggets of potent crazy left over from his recent interview with GQ. So when TIME was ready, Jaden the Influential Teen asked them to find a comfortable spot on the floor away from any sharp objects, set their Facebook status to “Away“, and get ready to fly high on the physical manifestation of the word bonkers.

On the most influential thing he’s ever done:
“Being born was the most influential thing that’s ever happened to me, for myself. As far as people, what they think is influential—like I said, the thing that you can make the most fun of and laugh at the most is whatever would be the most influential to the pop culture of the world.”

On getting attention for the nonsense coming out of his mouth:
“People really only care if there’s something that they can make fun of and if it’s something that’s 100 percent true or if I’m starting to talk about pesticides and Agent Orange in the Vietnam War and stuff like that, I don’t feel like people will necessarily care unless there’s an aspect that you can laugh at.”

On why people laugh at the shit Jaden Smith says:
“That’s the nature of human beings that are not aware.”

On how he doesn’t do lame shit, like red carpets (rich teen, please):
“And awards shows, I only go because my friends are there. And I want to see my friends. That’s why I don’t walk the red carpet, because I don’t care for you to comment on what I’m wearing, and how I’m wearing it, and who wore it better.”

On what Jaden Smith wants to do:
“My whole goal is to heal the entire planet…I want to heal the whole world like a superhero would do.”

He also went on to repeat the statement he made to GQ about disappearing ten years from now and all that shit about Galileo. You can read the whole thing here in the event you’d like a massive headache, but are too lazy to eat an entire bowl of Halloween candy.

I…don’t even know where to start, honestly. I will say this, though: I feel really bad for Jaden Smith’s brain. I think my brain has a difficult job, but it’s nothing compared to the overtime Jaden Smith’s brain has to put in. The next time my brain takes longer than 4 minutes to remember the names of all the characters from Gravedale High, I’m going to remind it that Jaden Smith’s brain is working twice as hard and to stop being so damn lazy.


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