Jessica Simpson Was Probably Drinking On The Job Last Night

September 18, 2015 / Posted by:

Drinking on the job? Millionaire fashion MOGULS are just like us!

I watch a lot of HSN and QVC, because they’re always selling pure, potent comedy for just 4 easy payments of zero dollars. It’s free laughs! I figure that some of them involved are either on pills, the sweet nectar, the good shit, the bad shit or all of the above, because some of the stuff that comes out of their mouths is unleaded WTF fuel and you’d have to be on something to sell that shit. Well, everyone’s favorite queef-brained fashion mogul was on HSN last night where she added more gold bars to her billion-dollar empire by selling crap from her fashion line. I hate myself for not knowing that she was on, because people who watched say that she was a mess from beginning to end. So far, there seems to be only one 30-second clip making the rounds and I’m not really getting “plastered” from this, but I am getting the Xanax rambles mixed with a few cups of red wine. Doctors call that a stage 2 Mariah Carey.

That doesn’t even come close to the Valium-induced train wreck of slurring messiness that Paula Abdul once served up on QVC. But if Jessica named those jeans herself, then all of the interventionists from Intervention need to drag her into rehab now. Because naming a pair of jeans “Kiss Me” jeans is a loud cry for help!

And here’s Messica and whatshisname at the airport a few days ago.

Pics: Splash

SHARE
Our commenting rules: Don't be racist or bigoted, or post comments like "Who cares?", or have multiple accounts, or repost a comment that was deleted by a mod, or post NSFW pics/videos/GIFs, or go off topic when not in an Open Post, or post paparazzi/event/red carpet pics from photo agencies due to copyright infringement issues. Also, promoting adblockers, your website, or your forum is not allowed. Breaking a rule may result in your Disqus account getting permanently or temporarily banned. New commenters must go through a period of pre-moderation. And some posts may be pre-moderated so it could take a minute for your comment to appear if it's approved. If you have a question or an issue with comments, email: michaelk@dlisted.com

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >