Open Post: Hosted By The Cast Of Lifetime’s “Full House” Movie

June 4, 2015 / Posted by:

More like “Full House of Oriental Trading Company Wigs.”

Since Full House is so in again right now, Lifetime decided to follow the trend by making an unauthorized Full House movie called The Unauthorized Full House Story. (Lifetime’s title maker really deserves all the raises.) I’m surprised Lifetime wasn’t stopped from using the Full House name and had to call their future mess The Unauthorized Story Of That Sitcom From The 80s Whose Title Rhymes With Bull Mouse. Today, Lifetime released the first picture of the cast of people you don’t know and the dude who used to do Miley Cyrus as John Stamos. I only have one word for this:

MESS!!!!!

So far, this looks like it’s going to be even more god awful than the unauthorized Saved By The Bell movie and I really cannot wait. That cast looks like a cult who broke into the Tanner family house, tied everyone up in the attic and took over their identities. I think the casting director said “fuck it” and let Mr. Bear choose the cast while they went out to get drunk. I can’t even call this the 99 Cent Store version of Full House, because the 99 Cent Store at least tries a little to create generic ass knock-offs that are somewhat similar to the thing they’re copying. This isn’t even close and I love it. This is the perfect cast!

opfullhouselifetime3

But really, it’s all fun and games until I see the Kimmy Gibbler knock-off.

via The Wrap

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