The meaning of true love stepped out on the ledge today after it found out that Pamela Anderson and Rick Salmonella officially gave an encore performance of their first divorce. But the meaning of true love immediately stepped off of the ledge and crawled back into the window after finding out that Miley Cyrus may be bumping her pork rind poon against Liam Hemsworth’s Australian peen again.
Miley and that Patrick Schwarzenegger twink broke up a minute ago and probably because she temporarily woke up from the good shit-induced haze she’s always in and realized that she doesn’t want to spend another second getting eye humped by Arnold at one of his family dinners. She already has to deal with that at her own house. So she quit Patrick and now UsWeekly says that she’s drying her hillbilly chipmunk tears on Liam’s dick.
Miley and Liam got engaged in 2012. They broke up a year later. But just like a serious case of Herpes that refuses to go dormant, they’re baaaaaack. Some source says that Miley and Liam have been hanging around together (read: rubbing wet parts again).
“They’ve been hanging out in L.A., but only a few people know. Dating could definitely happen.”
Credit 22-year-old Cyrus’ can’t-stop, won’t-stop persistence. Following their September 2013 split, “Liam cut her off, but she would still text him,” adds a second source. “He eventually started answering. They would check in on each other here and there.”
Still, the Australian hunk is proceeding with caution. After all, a Cyrus romance takes twerk. “Liam has rough stories about that relationship,” says the Hemsworth insider. “But he always talks about how fun she was to hang out with and their great chemistry.”
“How fun she was and great chemistry” may or may not be code for “she let him stick the tip in her butt and she always has the best weed.”
I am all for these two being back together. When Miley and Patrick broke up, I braced myself, because I thought she was going to bring on the apocalypse by rebounding with her twin Justin Bieber. But then again, if Miley wants to know what it feels like to fuck Justin Bieber, she’d just rub her pussy against a mirror. It would be more enjoyable and the mirror wouldn’t cry afterward.
And you can tell that Miley is in love again, because she wrote these romantic words of poetry on her Instagram yesterday: