Open Post: Hosted By The Empress Of Pop’s Demure Cell Phone Photo Shoot In A Parking Garage

Slap yourself twice with a gloved hand if you said to yourself, “Madonna, put some clothes on already!” Madge wishes she would’ve come up with an original and highly artistic photo shoot like this.

I was scrolling through the photo agencies earlier today and after looking at boring picture after boring picture, my eyeballs were hit with the vision of barefoot elegance in a gym towel posing in front of a car in some parking lot. This is Nadeea and that name and face is probably filling your head with nothing but questions marks. Me too, me too, but after researching her for hours (aka a 2 second Google search), I learned that she’s a Paris-born American pop singer who has gifted the music world with platinum aluminum foil hits like “Fuck Me Daddy” and “Song About Polar Bears.” Nadeea is also a social activist, boxing expert and an aspiring gold digger. Basically, she might be my new hero.

The photo agency I got these pictures from said that our new Empress of Pop took these French Vogue-worthy portraits in front of Khloe Kartrashian’s Rolls Royce in a gym parking lot:

Pop Star Nadeea Volianova personal cell-phone photos in front of Khloe Kardashian’s car wearing only a towel in the parking structure of the Beverly Hills gym where they both work out.

FINALLY, we know the sole reason why the Kartrashians exist. If they weren’t greedy fame whores, Khlozilla might not have been able to afford that gaudy wookie mobile and then Nadeea would’ve never posed in front it. The answer to the question, “Why are the Kartrashians a thing?” has finally been answered with this guerrilla glamour photo shoot. Thank you, Nadeea!

Pics: Splash