Susan Sarandon’s ping-pong mogul boy toy is 37 years old and so he’s starting to spoil a bit and smell and it won’t be long before he starts spouting white pubes and complains about back pain after they fuck on the ping-pong table. So it’s about that time for Susan Sarandon to drop him and get herself some fresh, younger meat. Page Six says that 68-year-old Susan is done shooting ping-pongs out of her poon and into the mouth of Jonathan Bricklin (you know how kinky those ping-pong playing types are) and it’s not because he old now. It’s because he wants to be in a reality show. Reality shows: destroying relationships since 2005.
A source tells Page Six that the ping-pong dude signed up to do a reality show for AOL called “Connected,” which follows 6 New Yorkers and their partners. Each couple was given a camera to record their lives for 6 months. Susan agreed to do it at first, but quickly realized that she’s too good for that shit. So she dumped him after 5 years together.
“It caused a lot of strain in the relationship. It’s documented for the show that Susan breaks up with him because she doesn’t want to be involved with the show. She says, ‘You’re a cast member, I’m not.’”
The source says that they’re trying to work things out so there’s a chance they’ll get back together.
What is there to work out? He chose a reality show over her! This is how it begins. First, he gets her to do a semi-artsy “docu-series” for AOL and then suddenly she’s starring in The Real Housewives of Ping-Pong Moguls for Bravo! Besides, I would’ve quit that bitch as soon as he said, “Let’s star in a reality show for AOL.” Just reading the name AOL gives me the shakes. It takes me back to the late 90s when I’d chew off the tips of my finger skin while waiting to see if I’d get onto AOL via dial-up or not. And nothing felt lonelier than finally getting onto AOL and not hearing that guy say “You’ve Got Mail.” AOL held my emotions in their hands, so screw them for that!
UPDATE: Jonathan Bricklin queefed up a statement to People explaining the current state of his relationship with Susan Sarandon. He doesn’t really deny that they’re broken up. It sounds like he found a really, really complicated way to say, “We’re just friends now.”
“Susan and I have a lot of respect and great admiration for each other. It’s impossible to concisely characterize our relationship, other than to say that it continues to evolve in new and unexpected ways. She supported my decision to be a part of AOL’s Connected, and making this series about my life has brought up real and somewhat unexplored issues, but it didn’t break us up.”
And here’s Susan trolling for new trade at the Hamburg Trade Fair in Germany last week.
Pics: Wenn.com, Getty