Hot Slut Of The Day!

Benjamin, the orphaned pygmy goat who has pranced into the hearts of millions.

I know, I don’t know why I picked a screen shot where it looks like Benjamin’s saying, “What up, vato.” I’d like to think that he’s saying, “Keep ya head up!” Because Benjamin hasn’t let getting abandoned by his mom keep him down.

Just hours after Benjamin started breathing the Earth’s oxygen for the first time, his biological mama je’e hit the road and let him live his life on his own, because she was unable to feed him. According to the 3 second Google search I did, sometimes mom goats can’t nurse their kids because their chichis won’t produce leche or their kid can’t suck on their nipple right. Tom Horsfield (Side note: I wish Whores Fields was my last name), who runs the Pot House Hamlet estate in Yorkshire (Second side note: I wish my last name was Whores Field and I wish lived on an estate called Pot House), took Benjamin in.

For the past few weeks, Tom has been Benjamin’s daddy and has done everything for him from bottle feeding him and taking him for walks. Pot House Hamlet is a tourist attraction in Yorkshire, so Benjamin has become a breakout star with visitors. Benjamin lives in the house now, but Daddy Whores Field will release him into the fields with the other goats when he becomes a grown up goat.

Metro also says that the original video of Benjamin sucking on a bottle and frolicking around got over 30 million views, because this is the Internet.

It’s Friday, so all you Mon-Fri workers should be doing the happy strut that Benjamin’s busting out. He’s prancing the way a 9-year-old me pranced on Christmas morning after “Santa” brought me a Pogo Ball.