Happy Hallo–what-in-the-fuck did I just watch??? To promote her upcoming “One Christmas Tour” (looks like I know what we’re doing for the Dlisted Christmas party this year), LeAnn Rimes released a 3-minute long Halloween-themed video, and it’s truly a nightmare-inducing NeverEnding American Horror Story MESS! I guess it’s called the “One Christmas” tour because after watching this video, you’ll celebrate one last Christmas with your family before they commit you to a mental hospital after you slowly go insane from the recurring nightmares of LeAnn’s terrifying evil clown smile from the 1:47 mark.
Normally I’d advise anyone to watch almost anything stoned out of their mind, but NOT THIS! It’s too fucking weird. It begins with LeAnn greeting trick-or-treaters dressed like a crazy-in-the-face slutty Aerobicicse unicorn. Then three elves (who I assume were hired by Brandi Glanville) home invade LeAnn’s ass and chase her around the house while the possessed demon squirrel cousins of Alvin and the Chipmunks sing out the names of the locations where LeAnn’s tour will be stopping.
Then shit turns into The Ring meets Law & Order: SVU meets HOLD ME CLOSE, JESUS when a bunch of creepy images start flashing while LeAnn tries to fight off her toy-making attackers. Oh, but it was all a dream! Or was it?? Either way, I need to see my therapist.