The Clinic Where Joan Rivers Stopped Breathing Probably Should Have Performed Her Procedure At A Hospital

September 10, 2014 / Posted by:

It’s been nearly a week since legendary comedian, spitter of hot fire, and QVC queen Joan Rivers sashayed up the red carpet to Heaven, and we’re still searching for answers as to why she was tragically taken away from us. WHY GOD, WHY??? He should have at least waited until after the Golden Globes! So far we have the Who (Joan Rivers), the When (a week ago), the Where (in a hospital room), the What (throat surgery), and now we have a possible Why.

According to the NY Daily News, when Joan checked into a Manhattan clinic two weeks ago, she was expecting doctors to perform an endoscopy, a pretty routine outpatient procedure. Unfortunately once they were in there, they discovered something not-right on her vocal cords and Joan’s personal doctor asked if he could biopsy it. However, medical experts say that a removing something from a person’s vocal cords is the kind of thing that should be performed in a hospital, not a clinic that deals primarily with digestive issues.

Of course, we know what happened next: Joan’s vocal cords seized up and cut off her air supply, and she was rushed to the hospital. A source claims that if the procedure had been performed in a hospital, she might still be alive. So far the clinic won’t comment on anything that went down because of patient confidentiality laws, but they have released a statement sort of throwing denying that it was their fault:

“A biopsy of vocal cords has never been performed at Yorkville Endoscopy. General anesthesia has never been administered at Yorkville Endoscopy. The type of sedation used at Yorkville Endoscopy is monitored anesthesia care. Our anesthesiologists utilize light to moderate sedation.

“Yorkville Endoscopy has strict policies in place for the criteria of who gets treated in this center versus in a hospital. Every patient is pre-screened by their gastroenterologist, an anesthesiologist and a nurse for appropriateness to be treated at Yorkville Endoscopy. Some patients are also pre-screened by their personal physicians.

“Yorkville Endoscopy has all necessary airway equipment, including a fiber optic scope available for emergency intubation. Three to four board certified anesthesiologists are on duty at Yorkville Endoscopy at any given time.”

Sweet salty Jesus, what a mess. I’ve had a biopsy in a clinic before, so I know how messy that shit can get. Even though the doctor shot my back full of anesthesia, I could still feel everything and it was awful; it felt like he was working with a child’s plastic sand shovel. Then all the anesthesia decided to take a vacation to the lower half of my body, and when I went to stand up, my legs were frozen and I fell off the table. Oh, and I was topless because that paper robe fell off. At least if I was in the hospital I might have gotten a bowl of lime jello.

And now that we sort of know the Why of how Joan died, we can get to the How – as in how soon do you think the glamorous ghost of Joan will start haunting the shit out of the medical malpracticing fools at that endoscopy clinic? “Very soon” – Joan.

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