Jesus take the wheel. Take the everything! This is definitely one of those ‘One set of footprints on the beach’ moments where Jesus needs to pick his ass up and start searching his pockets for PCP, because Snoop Dogg has clearly cut his good shit with the kind of bad shit that makes terrifying nightmares come to life.
Apropos of nothing, Snoop posted a bunch of pictures to Instagram of himself dressed up as his white alter-ego Snoop Todd. Snoop didn’t explain why he was dressed up like Walter White fucked a bag of flour and a Diane Sawyer wig, and quite frankly, the less I know, the better. Snoop Todd looks like the type of guy who is required by law to introduce himself to everyone on the street when he moves into a new neighborhood. Snoop Todd looks like a sex offender with scurvy. Snoop Todd would also sort of look like my high school librarian if you shaved off the facial hair (save for a couple under the chin) and dangled a delicate gold cross from Costco out of the top of that turtleneck.
I don’t know if people will react to Snoop Dogg in whiteface like they reacted to Nick Cannon in whiteface, but can whatever Snoop is doing really be considered whiteface? It’s more like Elmer’s wood filler face. Or expired foundation from Dollar Tree face. Regardless of what it is, Jackie Rogers Jr. isn’t here for Snoop trying to jack his look:
Here’s more of
Snoop Dogg Snoop Lion Snoop Todd serving up FACE! WIG! NIGHTMARES!, because clearly there’s not enough disturbing shit on the Internet.