Tyra’s Impression Of Lindsay Lohan Needs To Have 50% More Smoker Voice And 100% More Drunk

August 6, 2014 / Posted by:

I know this is Tyra Banks doing an impression of Lindsay Lohan, but it also looks like Tyra Banks doing an impression of Tyra Banks trying to pull a clump of weave hair from the shower drain. Smize and yank, bitch!

Trya (typo that stays) was on Watch What Happens Live last night with toe-tapping human-looking snapping turtle Derek Hough and in between talking about the head of Victoria’s Secret doing her dirty by denying her a lifetime’s supply of underwear and hustling RuPaul for a guest spot on Drag Race (she means as a contestant, right?), she got around to talking about the biggest achievement in her 23-year career: the made-for-TV Disney film, LIFE SIZE. Specifically, how she’s currently working on writing and producing (and starring in and directing and composing the score and running the craft service truck) the sequel, Life Size 2.

Eventually, someone called in and asked Tyra the most important question about Life Size 2: has she taken any acting lessons since she shot the original Life Size. NO! They asked Tyra if her co-star Lindsay Lohan would be returning for the sequel. Tyra said that she hasn’t talked to Lindsay about it, but that it might be difficult to get her to come back. She was 11-years-old when she filmed the first Life Size, and now – as Tyra says – she’s a woman who probably doesn’t play with Barbies anymore:

That was quite possibly the kindest impression I have ever seen, because there was 0% of Lindsay Lohan in it. Tyra’s eyes were open (wrong) and she was coherent (wrong). She didn’t appear to have a stomach filled with crushed-up pills and vodka (wrong) or try to convince anyone she was sober and ready to get back to work (wrong).

But that was kind of Tyra to pretend they were ever interested in having Lindsay return for the sequel. Unless there’s a part for a tired-looking messy booze-chugging party rat who steals Barbie dolls and melts down their hair to get high, there’s no room for LiLo in Life Size 2.

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