“Welcome To The Gay Clown Matador Grill, We’ll Be Your Servers Tonight”
And at The Gay Clown Matador Grill, the meth is always grilled to perfection and the toilet is always overflowing and flooding the dining room so wear your chic-est high waters.
Neil Patrick Harris plays Hedwig 5 days a week and so last night he decided to switch Broadway shit up and dress up as the Emcee from Cabaret if the Emcee was cursed by an ancient elder gypsy for running over his daughter. DOOGIE’S FACE! Not putting carbs in his mouth and going on the Matthew McConaughey Dallas Buyers Club diet to play Hedwig has made him look like the star of a Faces of Meth poster circa 1924.
Ever since Doogie Howser and his fiancé David Burtka moved to NYC they’ve really been going for it. When they lived in L.A., they were Club Monaco-wearing gays who drove blue Audi SUVs and regularly argued in the middle of a Bristol Farms about what kind of cheese to use in the fondue for their Doris Day movie marathon party. Now that they’re living in New York, they’re bringing out the eyeliner and the hair bleach. SO NEW YORK!
And at the Met Gala Meth Gala last night they looked like an Eastern European dueling piano duo who is currently taking Las Vegas by storm! Siegfried and Roy seethe whenever they see these two.
By the way, yes my eyeballs spent way too much on the crotch of Doogie’s man to see if he’s pitching a circus tent.
