ICYMI: Kevin Bacon Dancing To Footloose On The Tonight Show

Last night on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon, Kevin Bacon proved once again why he’s still one of the hottest pieces around (for reasons greater than just having a delicious-sounding name). Kevin was there to promote his show The Following, but it’s also the 30th anniversary of the film Footloose, so Jimmy set up his introduction around a joke that dancing had been outlawed on The Tonight Show. Cut to Kevin Bacon in his dressing room wearing his costume from Footloose. And cut to me letting out a slow yaaasssss, because I offing love The Footloose. And I say ‘The Footloose’, because there is only one. Yes I’m talking about you, Footloose remake! Hang your head in shame; you’re not a movie, YOU’RE A MONSTER.

Even though Kevin Bacon is 55, he can still move like he’s 25. Sort of. There was obviously a dance-double or two in a couple of those shots, but I’ll give it a pass because the original was as fake as the ass on a Kardashian, and also because Kevin Bacon probably has DKs (dad knees) and he can’t wiggle and thrust like he used to. But GUT DAYUM he can still fill out a pair of jeans. I had to call up my therapist halfway through that video because I was starting to get the most confusing downstairs feelings. “Hi, Dr. Black? Is it normal to get turned on by a middle-aged Kevin Bacon shimmying his ass around in a pair of stonewashed Kirkland Signatures? It is? Okay, well what about John Lithgow? Footloose era, present day, doesn’t matter. Hello? Hello?”