Open Post: Hosted By Katy Perry’s Video For Dark Horse

February 20, 2014 / Posted by:

It’s nice to see that the old set pieces and costumes from Michael Jackson’s “Remember The Time video got a second life.

A week after the “teaser” for Katy Perry’s video for Dark Whores got queefed up on the Internet and her Liberace butt dingles grill invaded my day terrors, the entire video has been released. It looks like a 5th grader’s diorama on Ancient Egypt threw up on a Lisa Frank Cleocatra folder and the whole thing came to life. Katy Perry’s going to get a barely coherent hate letter written in Cheetos dust from Brit Brit, because Flamin’ Hot Cheetos makes a cameo in this 80s cartoon mess of a video and so does Jiff (aka Boo’s matinee understudy).

I wanted to hate this grade school-level annoying ass video and put my crucifix up to this Illuminati fuckery, because it’s very “Judy Tenuta in a remake of Cleopatra produced by Nickelodeon,” but I couldn’t. I stopped hating it when I got to this:


….because it immediately reminded me of this:


And I cannot hate anything, as annoying as it might be, that reminds me of The Sorceress from He-Man. It’s against my beliefs.

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