Kanye West Ran His Ass Off To Paris

January 17, 2014 / Posted by:

The LAPD are currently putting their Detective La Toya-brand magnifying glasses over that little incident where Kanye Kardashian allegedly fisted a little racist for shitting out racial slurs at Kim Kartrashian and threatening to kill her. Radar says that you can’t tell by looking at Kim’s face since it’s frozen in time forever, but she is traumatized by the whole experience the same way a dude gets traumatized when he tries to toss her salad without taking a long deep breath first. Kim still hasn’t filed a police report against the little racist who threatened to murder her, but a source tells Radar that it’ll be interesting when she does, because nobody heard that little asshole spit a death threat at her.

“Kim hasn’t filed an official police report yet, but it will be very interesting if she does, because cops want to question her about what she saw and heard when Kanye entered the office, and allegedly began hitting him. If Kim was in such fear for her life, why did she call her fiancee and not the cops? She could have — and should have — done that instead of Kanye seeking some sort of vigilante justice.”

Whatever, everyone will see the truth when Pimp Mama Kris gives that little racist a mountain of money to re-enact that scene on a soundstage for the reality show cameras and add the line “I will kill you.” The truth will come out then! And while Kim takes selfies of sorrow, Kanye is showing her he’s there for her by running off to Paris for fashion week. While dressed like an UES widow who lost everything in a Ponzi scheme but refuses to pawn her favorite fur coat, Kanye hit a few fashion shows without Kim. Of course Kanye’s in Paris. If he’s going to go to trial for felony assault (he won’t), then he’s going to need some forward and glamorous ensembles to wear to court. Besides, Kanye’s probably got a few boo boos on his fisting hand and nobody kisses away his boo boos the way Riccardo Tisci does.

Pics: FameFlynet, Splash

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