Cyndi Lauper Was Not Amused By Miley’s Ho Shit Antics

August 27, 2013 / Posted by:

Seen above sticking out her naan ass (if you read that as “non ass,” that works too) in another Twitter portrait, Miley Cyrus has been re-tweeting all the praise she’s been getting for her performance of Spring Breakers: The Musical at the VMAs. But one ho who is not going to slow clap for that mess is Cyndi Lauper. Because we need to ask every single person for their thoughts on Miley looking like a rabid chipmunk in heat on that stage, Australian radio hosts Brig & Lehmo (via E!) asked Cyndi Lauper about it. Cyndi is all for girls just having fun as long as those girls don’t promote date rape while having fun. Cyndi put it like this:

“Now that was Girl Gone Wild. So sad, so sad. That was like Girls Gone Wild. She’s in a song that literally says that the blurred lines allowed you to—when a woman says no, that she means yes—and that is frightful because that’s date rape. It’s like, that’s okay, it’s cool. And there she is, a young twentysomething trying to prove she can hang with the big boys and girls, you know, basically simulating a Girl Gone Wild video onstage. And I just felt like it was so beneath her and really raunchy, really raunchy. It wasn’t even art. It was raunch. It’s so sad. I felt really sad for her. I know Gaga mooned everybody and I was laughing to my son, ‘This is like the naked video awards,’ but at least it was in art. It was like art. The other one was like raunch.”

She says “raunch” like it’s a bad thing!

Miley’s tragic back twerking made Cyndi sad and that makes me sad, but what is Cyndi going on about? Miley’s performance was a pro-date rape PSA and like something out of Girls Gone Wild?! Cyndi Lauper is the voice of everything, but she’s wrong about this. The most offensive part of that shit show was Robin Thicke’s Beetlejuice suit and the only things that performance promoted were tongue sedation, regular visits to the free clinic, laughing yourself into a coma and the dangers of twerking with no ass. I wouldn’t say that Miley promoted date rape. Sure, parts of that mess of a performance made me to want to roofie my eyeballs… Oh, wait…

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