Hot Slut Of The Day!
This eBay listing from the UK for a bruised and beaten up Mercedes (Camryn Manheim-looking model not included)!
Since Dlisted went through some serious shit today and yesterday, this eBay listing seemed like the perfect first HSOTD for the temp site. This couple from a town called East Grinstead in England kept it one hundred percent real when they wrote an eBay listing for their silver Mercedes. If you’re looking for a Benz that is so pristine and so immaculate that you can snort vodka puddles off of it, this is not the Benz for you. But if you’re looking for a Benz that you won’t miss when you drive it off a cliff after shoving two dead bodies in the trunk, this IS the Benz for you. The description is priceless and speaks for itself:
“If you are looking for an immaculate, well maintained example of a Mercedes e320 CDI… you have come to the wrong place.
If however, you are low on self esteem, with a strapped budget, but shooting for the stars, welcome to my auction. May I present to you, one of the finest feats in Germanic engineering politely modelled by my ‘more to love’ missus. As you can see from the photos this car has seen things… things it cannot forget. I have owned this car for 3 years, and up to then it had been lovingly cared for and maintained. Since owning the vehicle, it has been thrashed, raced, rallied, and the interior has been smashed up in a domestic, not to mention the time my wife booted the wing because I suggested she eat a salad or two. ( please refer to photo of foot next to dent for reference) The car was lovingly cleaned in preparation for the 2012 summer olympics, and may be in need of another one now. This car has been a dream, and only broken down twice. But since it has had new brake pads, discs, thermostat, front springs, all the fuel lines replaced, and i even put some water in the squishes. as for the bad bits… there are none… just kidding there are lots. The cd changer in the boot doesn’t work, but the radio does ( we have already preset the channels to suit our clientelle)
The air conditioning isn’t working, but the electric windows do, so bonus. The car smokes when you boot it hard.
The rear subframe bushes could probably do with being replaced…
The good bits. Boot is big enough for 2 small or 1 big person ( see pictures)
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This car is well admired and often stopped by members of her majesty’s police, who give out FREE advice concerning your drinking habits and whether or not your tires need replaced. ( which is soon by the way)”
The entire listing is here and it gets better. That car sounds like the Lindsay Lohan of used Mercedeses. If I ever plan on selling Dlisted on Ebay, I’m going to get this couple to write the listing, because they really know how to sell it hard.
via Buzzfeed