Reese Witherspoon Is Really Subtle

May 5, 2013 / Posted by:

Laura Jeanne Poon’s damage control campaign should’ve ended with her award-worthy performance on Good Morning America, but it keeps on going and she’s trying to get extra credit now. While walking through LAX last night with her permanently mortified husband Jim Toth, Reese Witherspoon wore a City of Atlanta Police cap. Subtle ho is subtle. Yes, her publicists should get a raise for dragging this shit out for maximum attention, but Reese is wearing the wrong cap.

Reese should wear a cap that says “I AM REESE WITHERSPOON, FAMOUS ACTRESS!” or “I AM AN AMERICAN CITIZEN!” because then every police officer will know to not arrest her on American soil.

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