At the National Fishing Heritage Center in Grimsby, England today, Duchess Kate continued to do her one job: bring up the economy by wearing a coat and dress that thousands of crazy people will buy just because she wore it out in public. While Duchess Kate waved, smiled, waved and grabbed at flowers from her subjects, she might’ve let the vagina out of the bag by telling everyone that she’s carrying the future Queen of England in her royal womb. The Daily Mail says that when Diana Burton gave Duchess Kate a teddy bear, she almost dropped the “daughter” word and it made a bunch of nosy ass hos around her try to get her to spill it. The conversation went like this after Diana gave Kate the teddy bear:
Duchess Kate: “Thank you, I’ll take that for my d–”
Sandra Cook, one of the nosies: “You were going to say daughter, weren’t you?”
Duchess Kate: “No, we don’t know!”
Sandra Cook: “Oh, I think you do.”
Duchess Kate: “We’re not telling.”
Then Duchess Kate smiled at Sandra and whispered something into the ear of her henchman. He snapped his fingers and two guards came out, dragged Sandra Cook into a prison chariot and she hasn’t been heard from since!
Duchess Kate’s ass could’ve been talking about anything. Just because she dropped the letter “d” doesn’t mean she meant daughter. Maybe she meant “dog,” because a gift from a peasant is only good enough for her damn dog. Maybe she meant “down bitch,” which means she’s going to give it to Queen Elizabeth. But really, she probably meant “dude,” which means she’s going to give to Prince William, which means he’s totally going to fuck it. I knew Prince William was a down low plushie.
And if they have a girl, they’re totally naming her Princess Harryetta Diana.