Oh, It’s Just Harry Potter And Don Draper In A Tub Together

It’s SO true that from our 20s to our 40s, most of us will grow 10 inches taller and completely change in the face. So that’s why it makes sense that Daniel Radcliffe and Jon Hamm are playing the younger and older version of the same character in A Young Doctor’s Notebook, a mini-series that will air on Britain’s Sky Arts in December. Just from looking at the pictures of Jon Hamm, this mini-series looks like it’s about a man who gets addicted to the wrong kind of meth, gets involuntarily locked up in a methadone clinic for years and escapes wearing only his clinic gown and a swollen pair of junkie bags under his eyes. But that’s not what it’s about. The Daily Mail has the plot:

The semi-autobiographical series tells of his experiences as a young doctor working in the small village of Muryovo at the beginning of the Russian Revolution in 1917. Jon Hamm plays the older doctor, who experiences a series of comical exchanges with his younger self, played by Daniel Radcliffe. The Doctor looks back on his life and career by looking through his notebooks, as he tries to treat the patients of a village that is struggling to enter the modern age.

My eyes scanned that paragraph several times and nowhere in there did I see the sentence, “And then they make out with tongues in a tub.” What good is putting DanRad and Jon Hamm in a tub together if they don’t touch tongues? Screw this movie. I’m not going to watch that shit. Instead, I’m going to look at that picture and imagine DanRad’s peen and Jon Hamm’s peen in an underwater staring contest. (SPOILER ALERT: DanRad’s peen will lose when Jon’s gigantic Hamm log eats it.)