From The “Ho, Shut Up!” Files: Kim Kardashian Compares Her Fake Marriage To Having Cancer

Kim Kartrashian’s staged marriage to that Geico Caveman lasted about as long as your average Ryan Seacrest queef, made her millions of dollars and the hardest thing she had to do was act like she cared about it ending. And that’s exactly like beating cancer! When a cancer patient goes through several rounds of chemo, loses their hair, barfs all day and goes through several radiation treatments, the first thing they say after they’re able to open their mouth without a doctor shoving another pill in there is: “I now know how Kim Kardashian feels!”

Humanity’s talking butt kancer was farting at the mouth to The Guardian (via Complex) about how hard her life is when this shit nugget came out while discussing her stupid divorce:

“We decided to film for the wedding. And that was a decision that he and I made together. But I think that, with any decisions in life [brace yourselves], like, I spoke to a girl today who had cancer and we were talking about how this is such a hard thing for her, but it taught her a big lesson on who her friends are and so much about life. She’s 18. And I was like, that’s how I feel.”

If reporters insist on interviewing Dim Karkrashian, they should talk to the ass on her bottom instead of the ass on her neck, because they’ll get more intelligent answers, but that’s not saying much. I swear, I just kan’t with this kunt.

(Thanks, Dana!)