Lindsay Lohan Somehow Moves Her Face In SNL Promos

February 29, 2012 / Posted by:

NBC should’ve gotten Elvira to introduce these promos for this weekend’s Saturday Night Live, because Lindsay Lohan’s face looks like the fire scene from House of Wax. The positive news is that LiLo showed up on time (I think), memorized her lines (I think) and didn’t freebase hand soap in the bathroom (I think). The other news is: HER FACE. Lindsay Lohan’s face is one thing in still pictures, but seeing it in motion is another. I don’t know if she’s storing crack rocks in her cheeks for the weekend or if she’s trying to live within her means by injecting her face with Fix-A-Flat instead of Juvederm. Whatever it is she needs to hit the brakes on that shit.

I am also well aware that she’s got a little coke bloat (or her face is going through changes as she downs meds to keep her off the bad shit), but she needs to stop fucking with her face, because her mug looks tighter than a butt virgin’s b-hole. Wait. When LiLo gets a moment, can she pass me the name of her illegal back alley surgeon, because I have something that needs tightening…..

Here’s a few pictures of LiLo leaving a restaurant in NYC last night. Is Lifetime sure about this Elizabeth Taylor thing? Because LiLo looks like she’s ready to play current day Brigitte Bardot or current day Linda Hogan, but not La Liz.

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