Lindsay Lohan Was Just Buying Crystal(s), Okay?!

August 10, 2011 / Posted by:

Lindsay Lohan’s spokeswhore Steve Honig is appalled that X17 posted an innocent video of her buying crystals in a Ziploc bag from a friend on the street and tried to make it sound like it was some kind of daylight drug deal. Steven would clutch his pearls, but White Oprah already ripped ’em off, chopped into lines and snorted ’em up.

The video shows LiLo sitting outside of Hal’s Bar & Grill in Venice and handling a plastic bag full of rocks that look like they could be used to make a smoke baby with a crack pipe. Radar says that the bag is actually full of sea jasper, a meteor, rose quartz and quartz. A friend bought them for her from a store down the street. Steve said this about the video:

“Knowingly and consciously making inferences about Lindsay that are completely untrue, and creating a fictitious story to get more people to visit their site.

We were not given a chance to comment on this story before it went up, and no effort was made to gather the facts about what actually occurred.

When I addressed this with the agency, they told me ‘we’re not the New York Times.’ They have made a horrific mistake; the worst part is, they know it but don’t care.”

You can say that this freckled bag of dumb wouldn’t be idiotic enough to buy the bad shit on a busy street in the middle of the day, but I also said that she would never be dumb enough to screw up her probation. And she did. I also said that she would never ever be dumb enough to drink booze while she has to undergo alcohol testing. And she did. At this point, I wouldn’t be surprised if she smoked heroin off of a stolen platinum spoon in front of the police station. The dumb bitch has turned “Don’t Give A Fuck” into her full-time profession.

But I’m sure that it’s just crystals (not of the meth variety). I’m also sure that in a few weeks a Dateline NBC investigation is going to reveal that hos are getting a crack-like high from licking sea jasper.

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