Alicia Keys Gave Birth To Egypt
The image of Alicia Keys pushing the pyramids, the Great Sphinx of Giza, a herd of camels and Charlton Heston as Moses out of her chocha is not what I wanted to toast my Friday night with, but now I am because she gave birth to a baby boy and named him Egypt Daoud Dean. What in the name of Tutankhamun’s mummified taint is right…
Alicia’s rep tells E! Online that Alicia and her husband Swizz Beatz welcomed a new kid into their arms in NYC last night. Her rep didn’t have shit to say about the name Egypt, but they said that “Daoud, pronounced da-ood, is Arabic for David, and is Beatz’s middle name.”
Egypt is Alicia’s first kid and is Swizz’s fourth….that he knows of.
You know, I’m going to let the name go and let it scurry out the school yard, because that child has more serious shit to deal with right now. I mean, imagine opening up your eyes for the first time and seeing Swizz Beatz’ toucan beak! Baby probably somehow learned how to do the Holy Mary thinking that beak was going to gobble him up. Or maybe he got excited thinking he’s now gonna get a lifetime supply of Fruit Loops. Let’s hope it was the latter.