The CAPTION THIS Contest

 

Poor Alice. She went to all that trouble when her husband told her to suck it in and all he wanted was a blowjob! - ISprainedMyUvala

 

 

Let's see here - a wilted flower, blackened banana, deflated oranges, a moldy apple and fruit flies? Oh, I know! You're Charo's hat! - Sweetas

 

Not Photoshopped! This 70-year-old woman has a 15 inch waist. Click here to read her story!

 

 

 

Sometimes, when I'm braidin' Dwayne's hair, I wonder--Is it worth it? Then I look at the fancy furniture and wall coverins in our trailer and I say to myself-Heck yeah, Crystal, it's worth it. Heck yeah! - LyndsayBluth

 

Damn, Rapunzel is looking BEAT these days. - SkyGretch

 

Jenny, I'm soooooo gonna win the rat tail contest at the Arkansas State Fair this time! Now, bring me my teeth. - Anonymous666 

 

 

 

 

 

Compared with all the other beer guts in the bar, Harry always felt insecure about his flat stomach. But now, thanks to silicone gut implants, he finally feels beautiful. - Migraineuse

 

 

WTF?? This isn't the pinata i ordered!! Oh wait... It's filled with booze you said? Deal. - downwithmuffins 

 

 

 

 

 

"Is that Pinhead guy gonna come out soon? My arms are hurting from twisting this thing." - Chad Clark

 

Sherri Shephard sends George Bush a present: a model of what she thinks the Earth looks like. - loric

 

 

 

Salma Hayek's tits explode after giving birth to Valentina. One man was lucky enough to catch the nipple!  - La Angel

 

Runner-up:

 

Wendy's still stands by its claim that it uses 'real meat' in it's Chili Bowl. - Mel-Tang

 

 

 

You'd have thought Kim Kardashian could've gotten a decent manicure before agreeing to be the official cup holder for the "Sperm Guzzling Championship of Eastern Europe". - waywhiteboyj

 

 

Dumbass, even if you drink all that milk, your tooth is NOT going to grow back, so quit smiling. - SkyGretch 

 

 

"How dare you accuse me of shoplifting?! I told you, I was wearing this when I came in!" - Madam S.

 

 

Do I have something in my eye? No, seriously, guys, I can feel something. Come on, is there something in there? I'd tell you! You bitches. - Jeebusss 

 

 

 

 

I guess the whole Paris adopting a blonde baby rumor was true after all. - kitten1313

 

 

See what happens when you fire your mom, divorce your husband, lose your lawyer and manager and fuck up your whole career and get skunked for good measure? Oh the shame. - pip_cheerio 

 

 

"Single Chihuahua seeks Hot Bitch to share my lavish lifestyle. I have it all except for you. Will you be the Lolita to fill my heart-shaped glasses?" - Madam S.

 

After a long battle against orange lung, BitBit spends her remaining days living a Britney and Cheeto free lifestyle. - Adriana

 

 

 

Bob thought he was looking good with a big weiner between his legs, until he realized he had an onion in his ass and shit in his ear.... - wblooney

 

  

Rosie O'Donnells personal chef guides dinner home. - Haxby