Katie Price

Jordan told OK! Magazine that she's not happy with her new breasts. She's going to make a second trip to Los Angeles to take them down even further. She was hoping her 32Gs would go down to a 32C. They have only made it to 32F.

She said, “When I saw my boobs, I was disappointed because they looked big and I wanted them to be a lot smaller. I’m really disappointed. In fact I’m going back to the States to get them re-done. They hang too low when I’m standing up.”

She also said that she's still holding on to her old implants, "They're in our safe. I'm going to sell them for £1million, and give 10 per cent to charity."

10 percent? Why so generous? Here's a thought. She should take out her implants completely and have them stuffed down her throat. It will solve everyone's problem. She will have smaller breasts and we won't have to hear her talk about how big her husband's dick is anymore.

Source: The Sun - Image: Mr. Paparazzi

Jordan infamously fired her nanny on reality TV and now the nanny is fighting back. Becky Gauld told all to the News of the World and a lot of it involves Harvey. Hand me my fucking shank, Jordan is about to get it. These are some things Becky claims:

Jordan pretends to be a perfect mother on camera, but off camera she's very selfish

She allows Harvey to eat 20 chicken nuggets at once, even though the doctors told her that if he over eats he could die

She was questioned by social services after Harvey burned himself in the bath

She taught Harvey to say "fuck off" so she could have a laugh

The nanny only saw Jordan put her kids to bed 4 times in 18 months

She goes on to talk about how Jordan doesn't watch Harvey's weight problems. Harvey must diet to his thyroid problems, but Jordan can't be bothered. She would rather just feed him McDonald's than try and get him to eat vegetables.

Becky also said she laughed when Jordan won "Mum of the Year" because she's everything but. Becky said, "I am so happy to be away from them. It is just really sad because I miss the boys."

I have a hard time believing any of this, because I've always seen Jordan as a good mother. If this shit is true I swear I would hug her tight until her implants popped.

Oh and in case you missed it, here's the clip of Harvey telling Peter to "fuck off." So charming. Actually coming out of Harvey, it is charming. Charming and sad.

Peter Andre has spoken out on Jordan getting her boobs reduced. Peter misses them, sort of. He told Loaded Magazine, "I used to think just a little more than a handful was plenty enough and I was simply into legs and bums, but Katie and her amazing boobs changed my mind, big time. Once I had those babies in front of my eyes I was a changed man. I often get asked what Katie's breasts feel like and I can tell you that they feel amazing. And very, very real. And very heavy."

Legs, bums and dicks! He forgot the dick part. Peter went on to say that he's glad she had them reduced, " I secretly thought they might have been too big for her body at one point. To be honest, she wasn't even my type. I don't mean she wasn't pretty, but those fake breasts and blonde hair wasn't what I'd normally go for. However, a few nights alone with her and I soon knew what all the fuss was about."

He secretly wants boobs like that. He caresses them thinking how lovely it would be to have two huge ones like that, feeling a big dick go in and out between them. While we're on the subject, what chicks actually love titty fucking? In porn movies, I never understand when a chick is fake moaning from a penis rubbing between her breasts. That looks like it hurts. Like a rug burn. Dick burn!

VIA The Sun

Holy Oompa Loompa! Jordan looks like she was locked in the tanning bed. Harvey probably did it. He was sick of her bragging about her new boobs. Seriously, she looks like Crispy Orange Chicken that's been under the heater for way too long. I do not want. You know she thinks she looks hot. She probably thinks she just has a "little glow."

Here's Jordan and her gay arriving back in London yesterday.

Splashnewsonline.com

This snatch is starting to look like a different person. It's obvious Jordan had her schnoze done, but now her cheeks are starting to look like she stuffed some chicken parm in there. Maybe she removed her tit implants and stuck them in her face. She's not even 30, so I can't wait where her future plastic surgery adventures will take her. She's going to look like Joan Rivers by the time she's 30. Maybe if she laid off the plastic surgery and paid attention to her husband, she'd realize he's a total fruitcake! Clam diggers?

Here's Jordan, Peter Andre and Princess Tia at an airport in Australia yesterday.

Mr. Paparazzi

Harvey's smiling! He's usually so grouchy. He probably bit Jordan's hand after this picture was taken. Well, she was probably hassling him, so she deserved it. Jordan brought the entire family to Australia to visit with Peter Andre's family. Of course reality TV cameras followed them. She probably also wanted to show off her new nose and tits too.

Here she is today with Harvey and her daughter Princess Tiamamaiamamamwaami or whatever the hell that poor child's name is.

Fame Pictures

Ugh...I miss the old Jordan. Jordan showed off her new and smaller tits while holidaying in Australia with Princess Tiaamii and Peter Andre. Jordan also looks like she's gotten her nose chopped up too. What the hell is Jordan going to do now? Her huge ass tits were the most interesting thing about her. Now she's going to have to step it up by saying even more ridiculous things.

And where the hell is Harvey?

Mr. Paparazzi