Theater

Harry Potter's giving it to some horse-man-mechanical thing?! Too much information. What did that poor sap in the horse mask to do deserve that? These are some new photos of Daniel Radcliffe aka Harry Potter in the London production of Equus. He also smokes! That little Harry Potter is growing up before our very eyes and let's hope there's pictures of him "growing" onstage if I ain't being too subtle!

Miss USA, Tara Conner, is fresh out of rehab for coke and booze abuse. She has apparently gotten offer after offer including Broadway. Tara is apparently rehearsing for the role of Roxie Hart in the Broadway production of "Chicago." Barry Weissler, one of the producers said, "Assuming both sides are comfortable, then this will be a win-win for both parties." A source said that Tara can sing alright, but her dancing needs work and she can't act worth shit. Damn! They will throw any crackhead into that show, literally. Is nothing sacred anymore? Don't the producers realize that people are paying upwards of $110 for this crap?! Why punish them? Source

Harry Potter aka Daniel Radcliffe is currently baring his naughty bits in the London stage production of Eqqus.

Tonight is the official night to see "hairy" and all. He spends a full 10-minute naked onstage. His bare bum is after the jump. He totally waxed that shit.

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UPDATE - DAMN THAT WAS FAST! Someone already won the tickets. Sorry hos!

Spring Awakening the musical is currently playing a successful and critically acclaimed run on Broadway. Spring Awakening was written by Duncan Sheik and Steven Sater and depicts how a dozen young people make their way through the thrilling, complicated, confusing and mysterious time of their sexual awakening. I currently have a pair of tickets for a weekday performance of the show.

You have to be in the NYC area, because I'm not paying for your ass to fly here and stay in a hotel and all. I've seen the show and it's fantastic. Trust me, it's going to be a multiple Tony award winner. To enter the contest simply e-mail with the correct answer to this question. The first person to send me the correct answer will win the tickets!

Question: While Spring Awakening enjoys it's public appearance now on Broadway, this is not true for the original 1891 Frank Wedekind play it originated from. In fact, the 1917 performance was almost shut down due to the New York City Commissioner of Licenses claiming the play was too pornographic, however the play was allowed to go on. How many performances did the original production run?

Visit Spring Awakening's official website to find out more information about the show.

Disney's Beauty and the Beast on Broadway will close on July 29, 2007 after 13 years on Broadway. The show would have played 5,464 performances. Beauty and the Beast was the first full-fledged Broadway musical for Disney when it opened in 1994. Disney has since opened The Lion King, Aida (now closed), Tarzan and Mary Poppins.

Beauty is leaving to make way for another Disney schmaltzfest, The Little Mermaid. The underwater tale about a mermaid willing to give up her damn fins in order to eff a human will try out in Denver this Summer before coming to Broadway this November.

My flame level is now through the roof for writing this. Actually it was already through the roof, but now it's touching the hand of Jesus.

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Meryl Streep will star in the feature-film version of the Broadway hit Mamma Mia. The International hit musical uses the songs of ABBA to tell the story of a single mother of a young girl who doesn't know who her father is. The daughter tries to find out who her father is and invites three candidates to her wedding in Greece.

Theater director, Phyllida Lloyd will make her film directing debut. Shooting will begin shortly in London and Greece for a 2008 release.

What's gayer than gay? Meryl Streep in Mamma Mia the movie! I don't even know what to say. Hopefully since Meryl is involved it won't be that bad. She has made bad movies in the past, but she can usually turn a sour movie good.

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It gets worse. Not only are people making a musical version of the Madonna film Desperately Seeking Susan, but they are setting it to the music of Blondie. WTF?! The musical will open next year in the West End of London. Debbie or Deborah Harrry will also write a new song for the musical.

The story centers on Roberta Glass, a bored New Jersey housewife who seeks adventure through her obsession with personal ads and the mysterious Susan, a street-smart East Village drifter. When Roberta suffers a bad case of amnesia, she and Susan unexpectedly swap lives and are plunged into a world of jewel heists, magic shows and rock ‘n' roll. The collision of Roberta and Susan's identities takes them on a wild journey of mystery, self-awareness, and true love—with both women discovering that you never know where your life is going, until something magical happens. The film, written by Leora Barish and directed by Susan Seidelman, marked the big screen debut of Madonna, who played the role of Susan. Rosanna Arquette co-starred as Roberta.

Let's hope they put the nail in the coffin by casting Madonna. I mean...seeing her play 20 would be a revelation. I mean...this is probably going to be so bad it's going to be good. I like to know when they come up with these ideas. Methinks they come up with them after a long night of coke binging and stripper hunting. Desperately Seeking Susan set to Blondie?!? This is the devil's work!

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The 1980 film Xanadu which starred Olivia Newton-John will be coming to Broadway in May 2007. There have been several workshops of the show over the years. The original film was a major flop when it hit theaters, but hopefully it will have better luck onstage.

The story centers on the Greek muses coming to Earth in order to inspire men. One of them calls herself Kira and helps an artist named Sonny build a disco roller-rink. I mean..hot right?

Producers believe that Jane Krakowski of Ally McBeal fame will most likely play Kira when the show hits next year. She took part in a reading this past August.

This is hot, but now I'm going to have that stupid song in my head all day. Yes, Broadway will turn anything into a musical. I'm still waiting on them to turn the story of the mole on my left ass cheek into a stage extravaganza!

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High Fidelity the Musical opened on December 7th on Broadway and it will close the 17th after only 14 performances. This basically makes it a HUGE flop! The musical was based on the novel by Nick Hornby. A film starring John Cusack and Catherine Zeta-Jones was made a few years ago.

High Fidelity starred Will Chase and Jenn Colella in the frisky rock-and-pop-driven tale of a Brooklyn record store owner who can't get his love life together.

The show opened to all negative reviews and wasn't able to sell seats. The musical has will apparently lose all of its $10 million investment.

Hopefully, this will send a message to producers that you can't just turn any popular movie into a rock musical.

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Don Johnson will star as Nathan Detroit in "Guys and Dolls" in London's West End. He will follow a fellow D-lister, Patrick Swayze. He starts performance in January 2007 when Patrick leaves.

Though Johnson is best known for his television work on Miami Vice (for which he won a Golden Globe for Best Actor in a Television Series in 1985) and Nash Bridges, he trained as a stage actor at San Francisco's American Conservatory Theatre. He had his first major role was onstage when he played Smitty in the 1969 Los Angeles production of Fortune and Men's Eyes. He has also had a recording career with his hit single "Heartbeat," the title track of his 1987 debut album that reached Number 5 on the Billboard charts. A second album, Let It Roll, followed in 1989. He also recorded a duet with Barbra Streisand called "Till I Loved You" that was the theme song to the 1987 film Nuts, in which she starred. His film credits include The Hot Spot, Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man, Paradise, Born Yesterday, Guilty as Sin, In Pursuit of Honor, Tin Cup and Goodbye Lover.

Heartbeat is seriously one of my favorite songs. I hope they somehow add it to the show. That should be Don's encore. God, this is going to suck.

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