Drunks

Monday, May 21st 2007

Guilty Guilty Guilty

 
TMZ reports that Lane Garrison will plead guilty this morning to one count of vehicular manslaughter and one count of felony DUI. He will also plead guilty to providing booze to a minor. He could face up to 5 years and 8 months in the clink. 
 
Lane's lawyer said, "Lane fully expects to go to prison or jail. It's very unusual for anyone in our society to accept responsibility for anything."
 
The "Prison Break" star was behind the wheel of a car that crashed into a tree killing a 17-year-old boy.
 
Damn! He has abs built for a prison bukkake session.
 
 
 
Posted by: Michael K


Monday, May 21st 2007

Who Needs a Cup!

 
Lindsay Lohan and Calum Best were spotted at the Anchor Bar in NYC last week where witnesses say she "drank vodka straight out of the bottle." She dragged her boy toy to another bar before coming back to the Anchor Bar, partying until 3 and then jumping a jet to Los Angeles.
 
Vodka straight out of the bottle? I think bitch is waaaaay past that. I'm sure it was a mixture of rat poison, rubbing alcohol, pop rocks and SARS.
 
Source: Page Six - Image: Splash
 
 
 
Posted by: Michael K


Tuesday, May 15th 2007

Eve is NOT Boinking Sean Penn

 
Eve was arrested last month on suspicion of DUI when she totaled her Maserati into the center divider. While she was in the slammer she got a mysterious visitor. Sean Penn dropped by at 3am to "visit" with Eve sparking rumors that they were getting it on. Eve insists they are just friends.
 
She said, "There's no craziness going on. I've known him for years. We got mutual friends. He saw what was happening and he just wanted to make sure I was cool."
 
Sean reportedly also offered to put up the  $30,000 for her bail, but Eve declined. Odd couple. Sean is a seriously nice dude for offering that cash up like that for nothing. I wouldn't blame Eve if she hit that. For some reason he looks like he knows his way around the apple. I have no idea what that meant, but you get the gist.
 
Source VIA TMZ
 
 
Posted by: Michael K


Tuesday, May 15th 2007

Sarah Harding Thinks Rehab is For "Pussies"

 
Sarah Harding is a member of the UK girl's group Girls' Aloud and is also a notorious drunk. She said she "admires" Liam Gallagher for being a drunk ass fool and refusing to go to rehab.
 
She said, "Only pussies go to rehab. I'm a bit of a geezer-bird, but I don't drink pints."
 
"You become a pro at walking from the club to the car seeming sober. But then the photgraphers follow you home. Not so long ago they had a picture of me falling on my driveway!

"I had an altercation with my handbag, couldn't see and I just hit the ground."

An "altercation" with her handbag?! Drunk mess was probably having a conversation with it! She was probably drunk when she said "rehab was for pussies." 

Source: Female First

 

Posted by: Michael K


Monday, May 7th 2007

Move That Bus!

 
"Extreme Makeover: Home Edition" host and all-around douche, Ty Pennington, was arrested on Saturday morning for guess what?! DUI!!!!  He was arrested at 12:35 on suspicion of being under the influence of alcohol and drugs while driving. He posted $5000 bail and was released 2 hours later.
 
The Celebrity DUI club was gaining members! I'm sure we'll break 100 by the end of the year! I'm guessing Ty had a little meth on his ass. He does have a slight case of meth face. 
 
Source: TMZ
 
 
Posted by: Michael K


Monday, May 7th 2007

Somebody Was Drunk on the "Georgia Rule" Set

 
Felicity Huffman has confessed that she was the drunk one on the set of "Georgia Rule." In the film, Felicity stars as mother to Lindsay Lohan and daughter to Jane Fonda.
 
She said, “Okay, it’s a little true. I was drunk a little bit of it, but not a lot. I wish I could have done it drunk.”
 
Working with Lindsay will make you turn to the bottle! Although, Felicity insists Lindsay is wonderful in the film. Keeping the peace.
 
“Once people see the movie, God willing, the performances will eclipse any gossip. People always love gossip whether it’s true or not. To me, Lindsay was a complete and utter delight. The minute I met her, I just loved her. She meets you with an open heart and wide-open eyes and gets right in there. She cares about the work. She throws herself in, 100 percent. I just adored her. She’s fantastic in the movie. It doesn’t get any better than what she did. Brilliant.”
 
Um...she has wide-open eyes, because she's effing HIGH! Damn. Dur.
 
Source: MSNBC
 
 
Posted by: Michael K


Thursday, May 3rd 2007

The Hoff is Drunk


Looks like the Alec Baldwin tape has started a trend! A video of The Hoff looking and acting mighty drunk has been leaked to "The Insider." The video was shot by his 17-year-old daughter 3 months ago. She begs him, "dad look what this is doing to you. You have to stop drinking alcohol, promise me you won't drink anymore. They're going to come tomorrow and test you and you're going to lose your job."

A inside source told "The Insider", "David told his daughters that if he ever fell off the wagon, they should tape him so that he'll know what kind of condition he's in and learn something from it."

The Hoff also issued this statement: "I am a recovering alcoholic. Despite that, I have been going through a painful divorce and I have recently been separated from my children due to my work. I have been successfully dealing with my issue. Unfortunately, I did have a brief relapse, but part of recovery is relapse. Because of my honest and positive relationship with my children, who were concerned for my well-being, there was a tape made when I had a relapse to show me what I was like. I have seen the tape. I have learned from it, and I am back on my game. I thank God for the love and concern from my children."

The "job" she's talking about is a role in the Las Vegas production of The Producers.

He's a MESS! Blue jeans, gut over vagina, slurred words, pizza...I almost thought it was Brit Brit!

Posted by: Michael K


Thursday, May 3rd 2007

Busta Busted

 
We've got another member of the Celebrity DUI Club! Busta Rhymes was arrested early this morning in NYC on suspicion of DUI. Busta wasn't even driving bad! He was pulled over because his SUV's windows were tinted too much. When the cops came face to face with Busta they smelled the booze and issued a sobriety test which bitch failed.
 
Busta has not been arraigned yet. He's in due in court next week on two assault charges.
 
The Celeb DUI club is growing! Let's see...Nicole Richie, Parasite Hilton, Eve, Mel Gibson, almost every Laguna Beach ho, Vivica Fox, Tracy Morgan.....and correct me if I'm wrong but I don't think one of them has served any real jail time! Let's hope Paris' skank ass is the first!
 
Source: TMZ
 
Posted by: Michael K


Tuesday, May 1st 2007

Yipee Kai Yai Motherf*cker!!


I love Bruce Willis. Bruce attended a NJ Nets game Sunday night where he drunkenly talked about several topics with a reporter. He said that Cybil Shepard is probably retired by now and that the new Die Hard is waaay better than the first one. I think it's the beer and pretzels talking.

He also didn't go out without dropping the "f" bomb. It's hilarious that at the end the anchor is totally apologizing for Bruce's language!

VIA Best Week Ever

Posted by: Michael K


Sunday, April 29th 2007

The Royal Family Would Be Proud!!!!

 
Princess Beatrice of York is the new love of my life. She left a SoHo club in London the other night with vomit or coke on her cheek. She looks like Igor from the Frankenstein movies. The 18-year-old ran up a $10,000 booze bill before she left. $10k in booze?!!!!! Are they selling coke at that club as well.
 
Bea is the daughter of Fergie (not Fuggie).
 
Isn't she so beautiful and elegant? I really need to move to England.
 
Source: Daily Mail
 
Posted by: Michael K


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