Sharon Stone

This past May, Cruella de Stone said the earthquake in China was "karma" for what's going on in Tibet. Well, 1,000 Chinese victims and a Manhattan lawyer served her with legal papers announcing their plans to sue her ass for $1 billion. $1 billion!

Ming Hai, the laywer from NYC, wrote, "For the families who have lost their loved ones or lost limbs or suffered severe injuries, your . . . statement and act has caused extreme emotional distress."

Sharon later apologized for the dumbass comment and said she "could not be more regretful for that mistake."

Okay, if Cruella even had $1 billion, she would have already spent it on her own mink farm and fur factory. She also would have bought up as many endangered animals as she could for her own personal use.

Ming Hai has the right idea. I say, sue the bitch. I'm also going to sue Cruella for the atrocity called "The Muse." I actually paid to see that shit in the movie theaters!

Here's Chrissy Crocker's older sister in Beverly Hills yesterday.

Cruelle de Stone really doesn't have any love for our animal friends. Ernest Borgnine, who starred with Sharon Stone in Wes Craven's "Deadly Blessing," says that while shooting the movie Wes kept trying to get Sharon to do a scene with a huge tarantula.

Ernest writes in his new autobiography that she only agreed to do it under one condition, "Sharon wanted the spider's pincers removed . . . Since someone from the ASPCA might be reading, let's just skip what happened next."

The ASPCA didn't respond, but Peta did! They told Page Six, "She chose to make a tiny insect an amputee. Perhaps she should change her name legally to 'Heart of Stone.' " Hmm...Heart of Stone? That has a nice ring to it. Sharon's spokeswhore laughed it off by saying, "If the tarantula was a male, we could add him to her list of her extraordinary leading men, including Richard Chamberlain, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Richard Gere & Dustin Hoffman."

I'm disappointed in Cruella de Stone. I thought she ate live tarantulas for breakfast. She probably turned the tarantula's sphincters (typo, but I'm keeping it) into earrings.

Below is the scene from the movie starring Sharon and the poor spider. I'm surprised Sharon cared so much. She should be used to having hairy things in her mouth.

Sharon Stone better have carded that bitch before doing fuckey fuckey times with him. The last thing she needs is Chris Hansen bursting in on her while she's pounding her cougar coochie into that child's face.

Wait....maybe Cruella de Stone isn't bumping no-no holes with this young bitch. Maybe, she's planning to wear his ass! Animal fur isn't good enough for her anymore, so now she's going to wear baby ass skin. Poor dude doesn't know it. He thinks he's going to bone the Stone.

I was beginning to think that Sharon Stone was over her addiction to animal print and dead animals. Relapse! She needs to be thrown into rehab along with Jocelyn Wildenstein for their obsession with wearing and looking like animals.

Sharon is really starting to look like one of those hags from "The Real Housewives of Orange County." I know Sharon does not want to turn into Lauri Waring, but that's where she's heading.

Anyway, here's Shar at amFar's Cinema Against AIDS event in France. Other guests included Natalie Portman who wore a dress by Brawny and Madonna who wore one of Tootsie's old ones.

How dare Sharon Stone! She has the audacity to drag another poor, haggard animal on to the red carpet with her just so she can look better. She's so proud of herself too. The woman never misses an opportunity to wear animal. Oh wait, that's not roadkill? It's Madonna?

As much as it pains me to say this, Madonna doesn't look that awful. Ouch. Yes, that was painful to type. If you squint your eyes, she sort of looks like an Olsen. The dress would probably look better on a Liza Minnelli female impersonator, but Madge pulls it off.

Sharon Stone however, is the lesbian cougar of my dreams!

Below is Madge, Shar and Guy Ritchie at the Cannes premiere of "I Am Because We Are." Say what?

Phoebe Price should really consider moving to Cannes. They adore her there! They photograph her chicken cutlets every hour of the day. I'm not even posting half of the pictures they take of her. They can't get enough of her! The French must love poultry.

PP crashed show up to another Angelina Jolie premiere at Cannes today. She already attended the Kung Fu Panda premiere last week. You know she totally swiped Angie's itinerary. Well, PP is the next Angelina Jolie, so she's just training for her inevitable future by following Angie around. Angie better watch her man. No man can resist the warm and salty taste of chicken cutlets.

And PP kept flashing two fingers to the paps while on the red carpet. Is she trying to do a peace sign? It looks more like she's about to stick her tongue in between the V and make the "licking coochie" gesture. She's directing that towards Angie. No woman can resist the warm and salty taste of chicken cutlets either.

Anyway, the poor fools that had to share the red carpet with PP during tonight's "Changeling" premiere included Victoria Silvstedt, Sharon Stone and Dita Von Teese. Their beauty pales in comparison to the radiance of Phoebe Price!

Animal lover Sharon Stone is in Paris and she's been seen with some new dude. At first I thought it was her bodyguard, but she's been holding hands with him which makes me think he's eating her squirrel.

The dude looks about right for Sharon. She's probably with him, because he goes along with her kinky role playing. She makes him put on a bear costume, she pretend hunts him and then pours his fake blood all over her body while humping his lifeless body. Totally gross. Don't blame me! It's her fantasy.

I still miss her creepy ass husband. Whenever I'm down in the dumps, I think of him getting bitten in the foot by a komodo dragon. That's funny shit. Bitten by a komodo dragon!

Here's more pics of Sharon and her teddy bear in Paris.

Sharon Stone left her Paris hotel this morning with a four-legged companion. We all know what Sharon likes to do with furry four-legged creatures. She likes to wear them! FreeTranslation.com told me "save him" in French is l'épargner. L'épargner!!!!

Cruella De Stone is on her way to the House of Dior to turn that puppy into leg warmers. She plans to sedate doggy in the car by recreating her "Basic Instinct" leg crossing scene for him.

Sharon Stone really can't go to an event without wearing some dead animal on her. I'm beginning to think that the animals aren't dead, but once they touch Sharon their souls are sucked into her. It's probably what she does to stay alive. She's sucking the souls of dead animals. When I first saw these pictures of Sharon at Elton John's Oscar party I almost couldn't believe that she wasn't wearing any fur. I figured she was wearing fur panties. Of course, she found a way to get her dead animal in. Sharon wore a rat's paw and said it was good luck.

Somebody perform some sort of ritual on that rat's paw and bring it back to life. Sharon needs a beat down and that rat paw is the one to do it.

Thanks MJ

Sharon Stone is obviously trying to tell us something. She usually attends events wearing something animal-inspired. To last night's A Diamond Is Forever party, Sharon wore zebra print, fur and a fucking peacock purse. Obviously, this ho wants to become an animal. I say we cage the bitch and give her what she wants. We can visit her every now and again and throw peanuts at her. I know you're not supposed to do that at the zoo, but you can do that to Sharon. She won't mind. Don't let her ex-husband visit her though! He almost got his foot bitten off by a Komoda Dragon and Sharon will probably do worse. It's best he stay away.

Here's Sharon looking like she's going to a MILF slumber party last night.