TV

I'm still holding on to the loose threads of "Cashmere Mafia." Don't ask me why I enjoyed that show. It was probably the booze, but that's not the point. Cashmere is pretty much on its way to being cancelled, but ABC hasn't officially gassed it yet. It's coming though. They are getting the gas chamber ready.

One of Cashmere's stars and the original wonk eye, Lucy Liu, is in talks to join "Dirty Sexy Money" as a regular. Lucy would play an attorney on the ABC drama which also stars Peter Krause, Donald Sutherland, William Baldwin, Jill Clayburgh and Blair Underwood. Samare Armstrong was demoted from full-time to part-time for season 2. So that's where Lucy's check is coming from.

DSM is another piece of shit I watch. I enjoy seeing Donald Sutherland in a suit and William Baldwin with a tranny. Lucy Liu is my favorite wonk eye of all time, so this is good news.

Source: Hollywood Reporter

Neil Patrick Harris recently denied that he ever said he didn't want Britney Spears back on "How I Met Your Mother." I don't believe his ass. He's pissed that Brit Brit, because she wouldn't watch his "Oops! I Did It Again" routine. Well, maybe she'll watch it this time, because People reports that she's coming back to the show for a second round.

A source said, “She had so much fun the first time around she really wanted to come back. It was a mutual decision to work together more.” On an episode that aired March 24th, Brit played a receptionist who falls in love for Josh Radnor's character. Fox Studios would not confirm that Brit's coming back.

In more important Britney news, who is that hot dude she's with in the picture above?! The girl needs to have him around more often. He's a little on the short side, but he can borrow Tommy Girl's Lady Footlocker platform sneakers (see below).

Here's pics of Brit Brit leaving Bally gym the other day with her mom. Lynne looks so....happy. That's weird, because the woman is never happy. She must have been celebrating 420 early. She has that "green glow" about her.

Bart Simpson has returned to the TV sets of Venezuela where he belongs. The Simpson was pulled from its 11am slot earlier this month and replaced with Titwatch Baywatch, because the show is too nasty for children or something like that.

A spokeswhore for station Televen told The Associated Press that Bart and friends will be shown Wednesdays at 7 p.m. every week.

The station is still facing fines and could be taken off the air for up to 3 days as punishment for keeping the show in the morning after being warned.

They do not play around! And I thought we were harsh. If Janet Jackson exposed her tittay on Venezuelan TV, she would have been executed.

I knew that in a chicken fight between Bart and Hugo Chavez, Bart would win. He always does.

It's looking likely that Jennie Garth will reprise her role as the scheming slut, Kelly Taylor, in the 90210 remake. Jennie was part of the CBS comedy "My Best Friend's Girl," but she dropped out of the pilot after the table read on Monday. The Hollywood Reporter claims it was a mutual decision between Jennie and producers. The rumor is that Jennie will hop back into the role of Kelly now that she's free from her commitment at CBS.

That bitch Kelly! I bet you 90210 producers were going to ask Brenda Walsh to join the remake and Kelly just couldn't let that happen. She's always sabotaging Brenda. It will never end!

Remember when she fucked up Brenda's hair? I know she did it on purpose too. Clip below:

20-year-old AnnaLynne McCord has joined the Beverly Hills 90210 remake. She will play Naomi, one of the prettiest and most popular girls at West Beverly Hills High. AnnaLynne joins Dustin Milligan. He plays a Steve Sanders type.

AnnaLynne recently played that teenage slut Eden on Nip/Tuck. Shit! Does this mean AnnaLynne is going to leave Nip/Tuck? Eden is the hottest bitch on that shit. She's my inner high school girl come to life.

In more 90210 news, Rob Thomas of Veronica Mars will step back and bring in new writers to do the rewrites. He told E!'s Kristin, "I'd do the additional pass, but I'm swamped with the two other projects and ABC has me in first position." Production has reportedly been pushed back to the summer and won't begin until the show gets a new head bitch. Rob will stay on the show to consult.

Rob wanted Jennie Garth to come back as Kelly, but hopefully the new head bitch will nix that idea. Brenda clearly is the one that needs to come back. She has unfinished business in Beverly Hills! They can even pull a "Strangers with Candy" and have Brenda enroll back into West Bev, because there was a glitch and she never graduated from high school. That bitch has to get her revenge!

Molly Ringwald is coming back to television this Fall in a show for ABC Family. Molly will play the mother of a knocked up teenager and the show will follow them as they deal with her unexpected pregnancy. Um....why couldn't they have just done a reality show star Jamie Lynn Spears? It would have been cheaper and filled with more pork rinds. Pork rinds can make any show!

Molly's new show will also star John Schneider and Ernie Hudson.

This TV show has a "For Keeps?" tang to it. I would rather have a "Betsy's Wedding" TV show. That movie blew my young mind away, because she wore a top hat to her own wedding. She so edgy!

Source: ET Online

Is this the new Steve Sanders? Meet Dustin Milligan. He's the first cast member of the new 90210 series. Dustin will play Ethan, who is described as beautiful, likable and a star athlete. 22-year-old Dustin is a newcomer, but he did star in some CW flop called "Runaway."

Yes, I'll be there every step of the way to see how Rob Thomas is going to ruin this beloved classic. I'll be watching you. To be fair to Dustin, I've also included a less douchey picture of him below.

And no 90210 post is complete without a truly amazing clip from the original. This is when Donna and Brenda go to Paris. It looks like they shot it in the New Orleans section of Disneyland! In the clip, a scout asks Donna if she wants to be a model. An amazing modeling montage follows. That shit could double as a commercial for "Glamour Shots." Do they have Horse & Hound magazine in France?

Is Andrea Zuckerman coming back to 90210? E!'s Kristin reports that Rob Thomas (not the Matchbox Twenty dude) has just finished his draft of the 90210 remake and there's a character named Hannah Zuckerman-Vasquez. Hannah is only in it for a quick second. She's the host of the school's news show. Jesse Vasquez was the name of Andrea's dude on the show, so obviously the girl is the spawn of Andrea and Jesse.

Andrea might not be the only one coming back. Rob still has his heart set on bringing that trollop Kelly Taylor back. Kelly is now a fashion design teacher at BHHS. Jennie Garth signed on to do a CBS pilot, so who knows if she will be back.

Rob has also given the Peach Pit a high-class makeover. The dump requires reservations now. WTF is happening to this jewel of a show? And what about the Peach Pit After Dark? Please don't tell me they are going to go "The OC" route and let stupid ass bands perform their to promote themselves. Ugh.

I'm okay with Andrea coming back, but Kelly Taylor?! I'd rather have Donna Martin back then Kelly Taylor! Rob can even give Tori Spelling her wish of having Donna be a MILF! It would be disgusting and offensive, but I would rather deal with that than Kelly Taylor!

I've become at peace with the fact that Brenda will never set foot back in Beverly Hills. She's too busy touring Europe as a famous actress.

And I leave you with an amazing clip of Donna Martin being pushed down the stairs. She's so graceful. That hair really brings out the horse in her face.

Thanks Jessica

My favorite daytime call girl, Kathie Lee Gifford, is returning to television! The rumors are true. Kathie Lee Gifford will host th 4th hour of "Today" beginning April 7th. Kathie Lee will co-host with Hoda Kotb.

Kathie Lee said, “It’s going to be a new experience because this time it’s with a girlfriend. Regis was like a bad little brother all those years. A much older brother. He looks good for his age!”

Today's executive producer told reporters today, “She is a morning television icon and is on a short list of personalities known by her first name alone. We are looking forward to her signature warmth and sense of humor in the fourth hour. Her addition to the TODAY family makes us stronger than ever, and she and Hoda will continue the TODAY tradition of smart, topical and fun morning television.”

YES! A huge part of me has been empty, because Kathie Lee has not been there to fill me in on Cody's daily activies. That was the best part of watching Kathie Lee on morning television. The woman would show up dressed like a call girl and then she would go on and on about her kids. "Oh Cody, ate cereal today! Oh Cody, shit in his pants today. Oh Cody, called me a frigid bitch today!" Good stuff.

Source: Today

Got Dayum! I never watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer, but I always stopped during channel surfing when Spike's hot ass came on the screen. Spike is 45-years-old!

It was a Buffy the Vampire Slayer reunion at the Paley Center in Los Angeles last night. Sarah Michelle Gellar, Michell Trachtenburg, Seth Green, James Marsters and the other skanks came together for a panel discussion.

I huge reason why I could never get into Buffy was because Sarah M will always be Kendall Hart to me. As I watched, I kept waiting for that hot bitch Erica Kane to take the screen and slap the hell out of her.