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The Insider seems to be the new WWE! A couple of weeks ago, Nancy Grace gave Jon Grosselin a concussion without even getting out of her chair and now it's NeNe's turn! The Real Housewives of Atlanta's resident bitch slapper went head to head with Michael Lohan in an episode that airs tonight. Michael Lohan thought his mouth was a weapon of mass destruction, but he's never met NeNe before. Bitch bombs him before he can even get a sentence out.

Michael tries to make a few fat jokes, but the message barely gets to NeNe's ears since she's too busy blasting him. It doesn't take long before Michael's turtle head retreats back into his shell. I was hoping that the Fight Queen of Muni would've drop-kicked him out of the studio.

And if you press your ear to your window, you can still hear NeNe shouting "TOXIC PARROT" all the way from L.A.

Note: Yes, I know her ass is saying "parent," but it's much more entertaining and fitting if you pretend she's saying "parrot."

Missing Person's Dale Bozzio has been put on the curb after she failed to pay rent on a San Fernando Valley house she was living in for a few months. TMZ says that Dale owes her landlord a total of $4,400. Dale confirmed that she's been evicted, and said she's going to go back to New Hampshire.

This news will probably send the cat friends of New Hampshire running for the border, because Dale was convicted of pussy abuse last May. 12 cats found in Dale's dungeon of death had to be sent to heaven, because they were so sick when authorities found them. Dale was sentenced to 90 days in the clink. She still claims she was set-up. All fingers point to Lady CaCa. Seriously, Dale should file a lawsuit against Lady CaCa for snatching her whole look! I present the court with EXHIBIT A!

Dale told TMZ that one of the reasons she's back to New Hampshire is to "pay penance." That's fine, but just keep her away from all pussies.

We knew them when.....

On last night's The Office, Dwight made the best decision of his life when he covered his succulent titty hocks with the all-powerful Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt! Seriously, they are going places. Don't be surprised if you hear that the Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt is starring in the next Twilight movie, or that they are putting out a single with Kanye West, or that they have been seen "canoodling" with Megan Fox (please don't let there be a sex tape). Ah-woooooo!

Those three bitches and that moon are even more magical than I thought. Normally when I see a cell phone clipped to a belt, all the moisture in my eyeballs gets sucked out. But my eyelids didn't even have a seizure when Dwight came out with a cell phone clipped to his belt! It's the magic of the three wolves at work. They better get 3 Emmy awards for this!

Image VIA Mashable

When Lance Bass isn't sitting front row in the audience at Dancing with the Has-Beens (seriously, he's there every week), he's butching it up in the gym. Pumping peen and pumping weights.

Surprisingly enough, I've never really thought about what Lance looked like without his top on. But then I see this, I get the drips and say to myself, "That'll do." Yes, I'm that easy. And I'm sure JC is scooting all over this picture while humming "I Want You Back."

Photo by Braden Summers
Source: Tabloid Prodigy VIA Towleroad

Prince and Alien Princess RiRi are both in Paris at the same time, so it's got everyone seeing double! Bitches need to a clue to figure out who is who. Because of this, Prince has been forced to prove that he's not the tenheaded alien one by flashing his luscious chest fur wherever he goes. RiRi's titty bush doesn't sparkle and shine in the light as much as Prince's. I'm pretty sure Prince's chest hair is the secret ingredient in Gelly Roll pens.

Here's the fancy purple lesbian, his matching piece and Kunty Karl at some Fendi party last night.

In that picture above, the only thing Alex Reid is thinking about is how he can't wait to get home, rip that dress off of Katie Price's body, slip those shoes off and then put them on himself so he can sashay around like he's LIP-SYNCHING FOR HIS LIFE on RuPaul's Drag Race! According to The Sun, Katie Price's latest fuck time partner just loves the feeling of satin against his rotten orange butt skin and lace over his raisin nipples.

A source said that Alex confessed to Katie that he has been cross-dressing under the name of Roxanne ever since he was 16 and he's not about to stop. Alex goes all out when he becomes Roxanne. Dude tucks his jerky dick into a pair of pantyhose, puts on a sparkly dress, slaps on a wig and sprays a shit load of make-up on his face. And he probably looks hotter than Brooke Hogan after he does it.

Since Katie is an "anything goes" kind of whore, she's fine with Alex wearing her dresses and she's even bought him a pair of high heels. The source went on to say that Katie can't wait to meet Roxanne. Make that two of us!

I'm beginning to like this Alex/Roxanne bitch! Yes, Alex has a face that only Harvey's fist could love, but the ladydude sounds he's down for a good time. I mean, he's a cage fighter by day, and a cage dancer in stilettos by night! Wurk it, GURL!

Somewhere in the world, Peter Andre is making a sad face while wearing a sequined gown, because if he only knew that Katie was fine with dicks in dresses......

And GOODNIGHT! This picture of Lindsay Lohan out in Paris last night can be used for a variety of purposes. If you've got a problem with critters digging up your garden, simply place this picture near your plants and they will never ever return again. In fact, they might suffer cardiac arrest, so you'll have meat for dinner! And if your kids have been messing with the wrong stuff, just show them this picture and they will immediately check themselves into the nearest nunnery. Shit, I don't even have a booze problem (fuck the first step) and this picture might force me to go to rehab and devote my life to Jesus. SCARED STRAIGHT! JUST PLAIN SCARED!

But on a serious note, I feel for SamRo. The poor thing's crotch area is probably cold, because her labia lips have been stuck to HoHan's face for the past few weeks. That's very selfish of HoHan.

Speaking of disturbing fuckery, here's 15-year-old Ali Lohan looking like she just slipped out of the exhaust pipe on the Rock of Love Bus.

Well, at least she's appropriately dressed to work the ho stroll now. Why isn't White Oprah in jail?

The police in Texas are currently searching for a stripper who tasered a co-worker during an argument at a strip club in Forth Worth called Cabaret North. You really should throw a feather boa around your neck and slather yourself in rhinestones before watching this video, because it is full of GLAMOUR.

According to the general manager at Cabaret North, stripper Kathleen Bennett and cocktail waitress Jennifer McReynolds got into a war of words. Kathleen was told to cool her coochie, but she didn't listen, so they fired her ass on the spot. Before she left, Kathleen said goodbye to Jennifer by tasering her in the back! When Jennifer realized she just got jizzed on by a stun gun, she went after Kathleen. Bad move. Everyone knows you don't rumble with a whore with a taser gun. Kathleen tasered Jennifer a second time and this time she went for the face. The club probably smelled like fried crustaceans and burnt body glitter.

Jennifer said, "It felt like every muscle in my body seized up and I couldn't move. Like I couldn't breathe. I couldn't speak." If you watch the video above, you'll hear that Jennifer still can't fucking speak right!

Before security could get a hold of Kathleen, she ran off and hasn't been heard from since.

It's hard out there for a pussy thruster! Not only do you have to worry about old men spewing their cottage cheese all over your thigh, but now you gotta to worry about another stripper electrocuting you. I bet Jennifer wasn't wearing lucite heels, because if she was this would've never happened.

VIA MyFox Tampa Bay

Brand new cast member Jenny Slate kicked off her first SNL episode last night with a BANG! Or should I say, with a FUCK! During one of her only skits, Jenny danced into my no-heart by dropping the FUCK BOMB. When she realized the beautiful word jumped out of her mouth, she made a "OH FUCK" blow fish face. Usually blows leads to fucks, but Jenny did it backwards last night.

Apparently, this is only the third time in SNL history that a cast member has brought out the FUCK. Some think Lorne Michaels might send Jenny to the back of the unemployment line, and others are sure the FCC will fine SNL.

I say the FCC should fine SNL for using the word "frickin." Seriously, it took me about 10-minutes to even type the word "f-r-i-c-k-i-n." I have to sound it out and type really slowly. My fingers don't want to do it! It's like I'm cheating on the already perfect FUCK word. Why use "frickin" when FUCK is there?

So, I have to slow cap for Jenny, because obviously she knew she couldn't disrespect the word FUCK like that over and over again. She had to show it some love. From fuck word lovers everywhere, thank you Jenny. Keep on fuck bombing!

And really, who FUCKIN' cares anyway? It's not like Jenny is introducing the word to anyone. Hell, babies come out of the womb screaming the word FUCK!

The producers of the UK's I'm A Celebrity....Get Me Out Of Here must have hacked into my brain area when it came time to cast this shit. By the way, it's not hard to hack into since the password is "1234" (just like LiLo!).

Britain's Daily Star (via IOL) says the producers are trying to round up Detective La Toya Jackson and Samantha Fox for the cast. Yes, two of the most talented and influential female stars of music (I'm not being sarcastic) sharing the screen together! This will be the greatest pairing since weed and Yo Gabba Gabba!

I mean, can you imagine them doing a jungle acoustic duet of a mash-up of Naughty Girls (Need Love To) and Bad Girl? SOUL EXPLOSION!

And since Toy Fox needs a live audience to witness their high levels of glamour, sources say Mitch Wino (Amy's famewhoring daddy), Tito Jackson, Brian McFadden, Brian Blessed and Nicola T are also in talks to join the cast.