Anna Nicole Smith

This video of an eight-month pregnant Anna Nicole Smith aired on Greta Van Sustern's Fox show this evening. Anna's face is painted like a clown and she's wheeling around a baby doll in a stroller. Howard is the camerman and asks her if she's on a "mushroom trip." He then tells Anna that this video is worth money. She's obviously effed out of her mind on something. Howard is seriously disgusting. This is all sorts of disturbing.

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Anna Nicole Smith's body was finally embalmed on Saturday at the Broward County Medical Examiner's office by two morticians from Aycock Funeral Home in Jupiter, Florida. Morturary workers were forced to sign confidentiality agreements to protect the details of her death. The pathologist said there was some deterioration, but she was preserved beautifully and is ready for viewing. Howard K. Stern will testify tomorrow in Ft. Lauderdale to have Anna buried in the Bahamas next to her son, Daniel (shown above with Anna). Anna's mother, Vergie Arthur, is trying to get Anna to Texas so she can be buried there. Vergie needs to suck off. Howard's crazy, but Anna should probably be buried with her son. That's probably what she would want. I just pray that they don't give her a public viewing. That's just creepy, but I'm sure Howard will sell the funeral rights to "The Insider."

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I'll keep it short and sweet. Anna Nicole Smith's possible baby daddy #6 has come forward. This peach is in jail too. Mark "Hollywood" Hatten claims he gave a sperm sample to then girlfriend ANS and think she might have used it to create Dannielynn Hope. Mark is in jail on a seven-year sentence. He had a brief thing with Anna in 2000 but apparently started stalking and threatening her ass shortly after. Here's Mark's website, it's a beauty. Also, Baby Daddy #3, Prince Somethingoranother, has filed a paternity suit. I don't even know what to say anymore. I love how all these dudes are coming forward after she's already dead. Where were they when she announced her pregnancy? Yeah, that's what I thought.

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Bobby Trendy was one of the characters of Anna Nicole Smith's reality show. He was known for being a super gay and making things with hot glue. He finally spoke out about the passing of ANS. He told TMZ, "Thank Anna for making me famous. When you think of Anna, think of red, white and pink hearts. She was love as she taught love. She was the breadwinner and supported four people by baring her breasts and genitals for men and women. She was an entertainer who will be missed." Using her genitals?! WTF? He should talk! Ok, so...Sugarpie CHECK! Bobby Trendy CHECK! I'm still waiting to hear from Kimmie! Bring me Kimmie and please take BT away. Too much lip gloss hurts my eyes.

A Florida judge ordered this morning that Anna Nicole Smith's body not yet be released citing a California court's ruling on DNA testing her body. Shortly after the Florida ruling, a Los Angeles judge rescinded the DNA order releasing Anna's body for burial. Confusing much? Anna's DNA was already taken during her autopsy. The judge said, "California has no need for the body of Anna Nicole." It is unclear who will get custody of her body and where and when she will be buried. During the past few days there has been a battle for her body between her mommy and her crazy (HKS). I'm guessing HKS' crazy ass will get her and he'll do sexy time to her before she's buried.

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In case you didn't know, Anna Nicole Smith despised her mother and wasn't shy about it. Here's a few clips of her talking about Vergie Arthur in a not-so positive light. According to ANS, she's like Lucifer reborn. Maybe Vergie did her in?! Maybe Vergie's the baby daddy?! Maybe Vergie is responsible for 9/11!? Damn, Vergie should probably just go back home and call it a day.

The National Enquirer is reporting that Anna Nicole Smith was on so many different kinds of prescription drugs that she really thought Howard K. Stern was trying to do her in. Well, in my opinion she was probably right. Sources close to ANS claim that she was a complete mess in months leading up to her death. They claim she tried to kill herself twice, used coke all the time and had many degrading moments from shitting in the bed and puking everywhere and anywhere. She hardly ate and sources claim she asked her staff not to feed Dannielynn Hope, so she can grow up to be "slim and sexy." The source claims Howard never did drugs, but Anna did a lot. "Howard never used drugs but Anna smoked cocaine every single day. She'd smoke the cocaine and 10 or 15 minutes later she would be a changed person, very animated and talking loudly. Sometimes she would smoke too much - and took pills to bring her down." Smoked crack? Made her baby an ano? Thought Howard was trying to murder her ass? Yup, all that sounds right.

A judge barred Howard K. Stern from taking Dannielynn Hope out of the Bahamas yesterday. Anna Nicole Smith's mother, Vergie Arthur, begged the courts to do something. Justice Stephen Isaacs listened to Vergie's pleas and immediately banned Howard from taking 5-month old Danni out of the Caribbean country. Vergie has said over and over that she blames drugs and Howard for the death of her daughter. She also believes that Larry Birkhead is the true daddy. She said, "I'd like to see the baby. I'd like to see Larry have the child." The paternity of Danni is still up in the air until February 20th, the day of Larry's paternity hearing. Vergie and Howard are both morons. Where was Vergie when her daughter was in trouble and needed her? Nowhere. Suddenly her daughter is dead, money is up for grab and Vergie's going where the payday is. I mean if she was any kind of mother, she would've taken ANS away from HKS long ago. Homegirl doesn't care.

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This Days of Our Anna Nicole really makes me want to take a ten-day nap. Every single minute it seems there's another revelation and I'm trying to keep up with it, but I'd rather be eating a Twinkie. Our trusty TMZ has broken it down this afternoon. Let's go over some new details: Larry Birkhead got a speeding ticket which may reveal he has the father of Dannielynn Hope. Larry got the speeding ticket in Burbank on April 15, 2006 when an upset Anna called him and asked him to meet her in a parking lot. Larry told the cop, "I got a call from my pregnant wife, she's sick." The cop took note on the ticket. Larry's attorney believes his statement was a spontaneous reaction to the event and not in the context of a paternity battle. Larry also said he said "girlfriend" but the cop wrote "wife." I say, whatevs! Basically, who cares right? I basically wrote this post just so I can have an excuse for posting this video of Shelley, ANS's toothless cousin. I'm surprised she's not on Dr. Keith Albow selling her story. Heroin teefs!

The Insider has once again followed Howard K. Stern in his ANS adventures. This time Howard brings the cameras inside the home of ANS to investigate a robbery. The Insider has at least 1 million hours of footage with HKS and ANS. They should seriously make it into a huge mini-series. I mean...this is crazed. I can't wait for the funeral footage....you know it's coming.