Rehab

Wino is not in the tank. I posted earlier that she checked into some rehab facility in London. I'm already bored with this shit, so I'm just passing on the facts. Her rep told People, "Amy is not in rehab. She was seeing a doctor who she regularly sees as part of her ongoing treatment. It was a regular appointment which she attends all the time. She has not checked in overnight."

Her rep went on to say, "She's happily smoking crack back at home." No she didn't say that, but you know it's the truth.

Rehab is for quitters! Who needs it anyway?

The Wino has checked into rehab. The Sun reports that Amy is currently getting treatment at the Edward House in London. This comes the same day a video of her allegedly smoking crack hit.

Well, let's see if it works this time. They really should have sent her to Dr. Drew's facility and put her hot ass on "Celebrity Rehab." Her detox screams would make Jeff Conaway's detox screams sound like mice squeaks.

I'm actually afraid of a Wino detox. That is some exorcist shit! I hope they have a priest on hand just in case. Her head is going to spin and green goo is going to ooze from every orfice. That's if she makes it past the day. She will probably be out of that bitch by morn.

Image: Wenn

Last night was the premiere of "Celebrity Rehab" on Vh1. That shit was depressing as hell. First of all, Jeff Conaway is a royal fucking mess. I felt like I was on drugs just watching him. I need rehab from watching his display. He is a hardcore addict and I felt his pain. Jeff showed up to Dr. Drew's clinic already high on $1,000 worth of prescription pills. Later in the episode he had some sort of seizure and is rushed to the hospital. That's the real shit right there.

Jeff wasn't the only "celebrity" to show up loaded. Porn star and future President of the United States, Mary Carey, showed up drunk and baring gifts. Mary brought her dildos, porn videos and strap-ons. Bitch wanted to fuck the dude from CrazyTown, but they took away all her toys. No dildos, booze, drugs or sex in rehab. Damn, that's harsh.

The rest of the cast included Chyna, Gitte, the little girl from Family Matters, Daniel Baldwin and Jessica Sierra. We all know what happened to her ass.

This show is going to get interesting. Honestly, I'm only tuning in to see Dr. Drew's hot ass each week. Well, that and Mary Carey trying to do her best Mariah Carey impersonation. She sort of looks like her!

American Idol loser, Jessica Sierra, cut a deal today in Tampa, FL. Jessica has been sitting in jail after the cokehead was arrested for being a mess in a bar. A judge in Florida has agreed to give her three years probation if she completes a one-year program at Dr. Drew's rehab facility in Pasadena, CA. Dr. Drew worked with Jessica on the upcoming reality show "Celebrity Rehab." Dr. Drew flew to Florida to testify for Jessica and get her the help she needs.

TMZ reports that Jessica faces two felony counts of possession of cocaine and battery. If Jessica fails the program she will go back to the clink. The judge also told her to shut the hell up and not talk to the media. "You are not going to become a celebrity because you are a recovering addict."

Dr. Drew needs to give Dr. Phil a beat down and pick up Britney Spears as well.

One year in rehab is a long ass time, but that seems about right. It's going to take that long to get the trash gene out of Jessica's system. I mean...knocked up in jail with a coke problem and a sex tape coming out? White Oprah better watch it, because Jessica's on track for Mother of the Year!

Here's a couple of clips from Vh1's new reality show "Celebrity Rehab." The clips feature Jeff Conway from Taxi snorting coke and the lead singer from CrazyTown smoking crack! I actually used to have a crush on that nasty CrazyTown dude until I found out he was doing Paris Hilton. I think doing Paris is worse than smoking crack. Ugh....I feel dirty.

Celebrity Rehab debuts in January. Jessica Sierra, Daniel Baldwin, Mary Carey, Brigitte Nielsen and Chyna are reportedly in the cast, but Vh1 has yet to confirm.

After watching those clips I need rehab now.

VIA Best Week Ever

Duran Duran's video for "Falling Down" features a sort-of Britney look-a-like being forced into rehab or some sort of mental hospital. The song features vocals by Brit's ex, Justin Timberlake.

The chick is a little too clean to be Britney. They should've thrown some cheeto bits at her, rolled in the mud and poured some Jenkem over her head to seal the deal.

Click here if you can't see the video above

Thanks Mardesia