Gross

This is a Playstation 3 ad made by TBWA in Austria. This shit is not funny! You should not fuck around with peen like that! Just no. The ad replaces a hot dude's dick with a thumb. A thumb dick! I've heard of pencil dick, but thumb dick? That's a new one. The NSFW version is after the jump. JUMP!!!

The comments are shooting out of me like Billy Ray's......I need to stop. The joke tells itself.

I don't know what's more upsetting? The fact that the Real World is entering its 21st season or that it has chosen Brooklyn as its next location. 21 fucking seasons?! I can't believe they are still able to find fools who want to get drunk and vomit on basic cable television.

Shooting for Real World 21 begins this summer in Brooklyn. The show's co-creator sent Gothamist this release, "The Brooklyn season, like the Hollywood season, will focus on what people loved about 'The Real World' when it launched in 1992 - genuine people, meaningful conflict and powerful stories." Um...didn't the Hollywood season feature a bunch of skanks who got drunk and fucked each other? Really meaningful and powerful.

It's not know what part of Brooklyn the producers have chosen to terrorize, but some think it's going to be Williamsburg. Personally, I they should put that shit in East New York or Coney Island. Watching the locals beat the hell out of these wannabe whores will make it the best season ever.

Image: Gothamist

I think My Little Pony Parker decided to pay homage to Mimi and Nick Cannon's wedding by wearing one of their centerpieces on her head to the "Sex and the City" premiere in London today. Kim Cattrall is totally flashing a cunty smile, because she's glad Pony showed up with fake green roses and butterflies on her head. Kim looks like a goddamn goddess compared to Pony.

Well, if Pony gets a little hungry, she can snack on one of the weeds in her hat.

Owen Wilson is planning to marry Kate Hudson a year after he tried to off himself over their break-up. Yes, commemorate one tragedy with another! The News of the World reports that Owen proposed to Kate in Miami and wants to marry her next year. The Florida humidity must eff with some of these people's brains. Owen marrying Kate? Aniston and Mayer?

A source told The News of the World, “Kate supported Owen during his low patch and that proved to him she’s the woman he wants to be with for ever. He picked out the ring and went for the biggest one he could find. He was nervous about proposing but Kate was thrilled and the whole thing was really emotional.”

Screw Kate! Owen should marry his one true love, Woody Harrelson! Nobody understands him the way Woody does. Mary Jane can be the maid of honor and a hookah pipe can be the best man.

Just when I thought that I've heard it all, comes this story out of Houston. If you're eating, you might want to skip this story and head on over to CuteOverload.com instead.

Three Kingwood teens have been arrested and accused of digging up a secluded grave and removing a skull in Humble, a city north of Houston.

Kevin Wade Jones, 17, and Matthew Richard Gonzalez, 17, both of Kingwood, told Houston police that around March 15 they and a 16-year old juvenile dug up a grave, removed the skull from the coffin and converted it into a "bong," a device used to smoke marijuana, according to court documents.

Houston police believe the teens disturbed the grave of an 11-year-old boy who died in 1921.

All the more reason to be cremated. Don't blame weed for this shit either. Blame stupidity. That being said, I'll believe it when I see it. Scratch that, I don't ever want to see that. EVER.

Visit The Houston Chronicle for all the gory details.

Thanks Jennifer and all the other that sent them to me. You're all sick nasty fucks!

As soon as I saw these pictures of Mark Ronson and his child girlfriend, Daisy Lowe, I got all "Fatal Attraction" inside. I want to scream, "I won't be ignored, Mark!" Daisy better keep her stuffed animal collection safe, because I'm this close to boiling one of her stuffed toy bunnies.

32-year-old Mark and 19-year-old Daisy were pictured as a couple for the first time in London last night. Daisy needs to go back to playing with Barbie and leave Ronson to the big bitches. I'm sure the girl is lovely and shits crystal bubbles, but she should put down the Ronson and move on.

You can tell Mark is thinking of me in those pics. "I won't be ignoooored Mark!!! I won't allow you treat me like some slut you can just bang a couple of times and throw in the garbage!" Actually, he can do the latter anytime he wants.

It's been a while since I've caught up with Alexyss K. Tylor and her words of wisdom. This time around, Alexyss is talking shit, literally. Alexyss just doesn't understand why a lot of you will stay at your man's house for 2 or 3 days and let him do you in every hole, but you won't take a shit in his bathroom. Alexyss is really concerned that you're fucking up your bowels. I agree with Alexyss and that's why I always carry a pack of matches in my pocket. When you gotta go, you gotta go. Nothing will eliminate the scent of fresh doody quite like a freshly lit match.

Alexyss speak the truth. I nominate her for United States Secretary of Health and Human Services!

And this video is pretty NSFW. I doubt you want your boss to hear some woman talking about sucking dick and exploding bowels....or maybe you do?

VIA Crunk + Disorderly

Katherine Heigl...Heigl...Heeeigl. You know, every time I say her last name, it feels like I'm hawking up a loogie. That's pretty fitting since she looks like one. Anyway, our first lady of loogies might leave "Grey's Anatomy." A source told UsWeekly (via MSNBC) that loogie is getting tired of that shit.

The source said, “She's working really long hours and is ready to move on." Loogie is currently locked in a contract, but is trying to find a way out. She wants to leave the show, so she can focus on her movie career. We know how that works. In a couple of years, she'll be begging to play Tracey Gold's sister in a Lifetime movie.

One insider said it was smart for her ass to make movies while she's still on Grey's. The insider said, “She’s a smart one. She saw what can happen with someone like Jennifer Aniston, who was crazy successful on TV, but can’t seem to carry a film, and she tested the waters early."

Heigl should move on already. A talent like her belongs on the stage. I hear Mars has a pretty amazing theater scene.

Entertainment Weekly has the first pictures of Josh Brolin as George W. Bush and Elizabeth Banks as Laura Bush for the movie "W." Unfortunately, this is not directed by Christopher Guest and it's not a comedy. Oliver Stone is directing this ass fuck extravaganza which beings shooting in a couple of weeks.

Elizabeth Banks is no Laura Bush. She looks more like your pill-popping auntie that is on welfare, but wears cheap suits she buys from Filene's Basement to try and look high-class. Josh Brolin looks like a vacuum salesman by day and a child toucher by night.

Kermit and Miss Piggy would have made a better Dubay and Laura.

This Razzie front-runner will also star Thandie Newton as Condi Rice, Jeffrey Wright as Colin Powell, Ellen Burstyn as Barbara Bush, James Cromwell as George Bush and Rob Corddry as Ari Fleischer. My butthole is currently in talks to play Dick Cheney. No deal has been finalized.